The Art of Loving Oneself
by Megallica
Summary: KuraHi and, later, KuwaYu slash. Is this the end of the world or is it all just a bad dream? Gore, violence, torture, body horror, slash. Version with lemons is on the site for grown ups.
1. Chapter 1

**_This fic is also on Affnet. It's more exciting over there._**

_**Disclaimer: Uh... I don't own the stuff that obviously belongs to Yu Yu Hakusho?**_

**Chapter One**

_The world has ended, so why do I still live? Why do I continue to wander this desolate place, searching endlessly, fruitlessly for signs of those who I once knew? Figures stretch along the periphery of my vision, taunting me with their familiarity but disappear when I try to get a better look._

_A flicker of orange and then black. I can almost hear voices. If I strain my ears, the silence takes on a less oppressive sound. The nothingness presses in on my brain. I am alone._

_I am alone here._

Kurama knew the moment he woke up that something was wrong. The alarm clock beside his bed had awoken him to nothing but static. Normally, the morning news blared into his ear moments after he woke. Instead, Kurama had woken to the sound of dead-air.

It was odd, but Kurama tried to write it off as an electrical malfunction at the radio station and he shut off his alarm. He stood, gathering his towel and clothing for the day, not totally registering the lack of background noise.

Kurama made breakfast, packed his lunch, and headed into the living room, content to get his morning news from the television. Unfortunately, he experienced the same perplexing dead air he'd gotten from his radio. None of the television stations were working. Was his cable out? He knew he'd paid his bill so why didn't any of the channels have anything other than a blank, black screen and the same abnormally high-pitched whistling noise playing in the background?

It defied logic. But Kurama wasn't going to stick around and question it. He had to get to work. In a way, it was refreshing to have such a dull, normal job. Accountants rarely had to save the world. Kurama had never met another accountant who had experience fighting paranormal creatures. He smiled softly as he exited his apartment to head for the train that would take him to work.

His satisfaction was short-lived, however. The moment Kurama stepped out of his apartment, he knew something was horribly, horribly wrong. There were cars stopped in the middle of the road, one or two still running but most apparently dead or out of gas. All the stores were vacant of people even though the 24 hour convenience store still had all its lights on and the doors unlocked. As Kurama walked, he began to feel an edge of panic. Where was everyone?

It didn't look at all right. Kurama walked past the house where he knew a large dog lived, waiting for it to bark but he heard nothing. Not the sound of morning commuters or stray cats. No radios or televisions playing from inside houses, not even the wind seemed to be blowing.

Not that Kurama was expecting the trains to still be running, he still headed to the station and was shocked when one arrived. It was just as empty as the rest of the city. Evidence of people was everywhere, backpacks, briefcases, cell phones, jewelry all littered the train but their owners had apparently left them there.

Kurama didn't get off at his usual stop. He kept going, kept riding the train to where Kuwabara still lived with his family. He didn't know what he was expecting. So far, he hadn't met up with _anyone_, although the longer he was awake, the more he felt like he was being watched somehow. The Kuwabara home looked the same as it ever had apart from the fact that no one greeted him at the door. Kurama knocked and waited, not listening to the voice in the back of his mind shouting that he'd be able to feel reiki if there were humans nearby. After almost twenty minutes, Kurama let himself inside.

Seeing Kuwabara's house, exactly as he remembered it but with a complete lack of any living creature inside, made Kurama's heart sink. Where had they gone? Not even Kuwabara's six cats were about, their litter box was clean, food dish and water dish full.

Kurama left Kuwabara's house and headed down a few blocks to where Yuusuke lived. He found the same scene there The television was on in the living room, but there was nothing playing except the black screen and the high-pitched sound of dead air. Kurama turned it off. That sound made his hair stand on end.

Kurama moved the afghan draped over the arm and sat down on Yuusuke's couch. Maybe if he waited, the Mazoku would return? By now, Kurama realized it was pointless. Whatever had happened in the night to have caused every living creature in the city to disappear had taken Yuusuke and Kuwabara along.

"Where is everyone?" Kurama called into the silence. He cringed at the way his voice sounded. Dull, lacking in substance. He knew it had reached no one's ears. It should have echoed in the emptiness. Why didn't his voice echo?

_Run, run, run, run. He has to be here! If I keep running, I'll find him. The scene changes. Now I'm in a cave, staring at a horrifying scene. I can barely even see it. It scares me. Is it a monster? Is it simply a tree? Why is there a tree in this cave? Why am I approaching it? It frightens me. I turn around and see Yuusuke. Oh, thank goodness, there's someone else here. But I'm not surprised to see him. I speak in a voice not my own. "What happened?" I'm angry. I am unbelievably angry. I want to burn that monster but I can't. It'll kill him. He'll DIE if I do. What should I do with my rage? Find the bastard that did this and kill him. Kill him brutally. Slowly rip his tendons from the bone. Bleed him until he nearly passes out. String his entrails from this very cave and burn them to ashes._

"_I don't know," Yuusuke replies. He looks scared too. That just makes me angrier._

"_You don't _know_?!" I demand. "You don't KNOW how this happened?! What good are you then? You're just as useless as the humans." Useless, stupid humans. That's why he's in this mess. That's why he's-_

"_Hiei, calm down. We have to figure this out."_

"_Be silent." I scowl at Yuusuke. "I'm already trying."_

_Hiei turns around. Now he's looking at me. "Kurama?" His voice reaches me from far away. I walk toward him. He is a welcome sight._

When Kurama woke up, he was still on Yuusuke's couch, having drifted off while he wondered what to do next. He was disoriented. "A dream..." he muttered into the emptiness, pinching himself now to make sure he wasn't still dreaming. "What a cruel dream..."

Kurama stood. Maybe Hiei was calling him? Maybe Hiei and Yuusuke were still alive. That cave, where had he seen that cave before? Was it Makai? Kurama threw the afghan away and headed toward Makai, already certain it was useless to check, but he had to.

It was easy enough to get through the portal. Too easy, actually. Kurama was disheartened when he arrived in Alaric and wasn't accosted by Hiei's guards. He tried not to let it bother him. Instead, he ran toward the jungle, terrified of the silence around him. Even the plants, which should _know him_ didn't respond to his touch. There were no sounds. In a way, this was eerier than Sarayashiki. The silence seemed bigger here. He was alone in the jungle and for the first time in a long while he was afraid.

A cave was up ahead, Kurama thought it looked like it might be the cave in his dream. He entered. "Hiei?" he called. Again, his voice didn't echo. "Yuusuke? Hiei?" Kurama kept walking, his pace faster now. He was running moments later. "Hiei?! Hiei, where are you!?" Why wasn't Hiei coming to rescue him? Hiei _always_ came when Kurama needed him. "Hiei! Help!"

He was alone.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho. This is a work of fanfiction for which I am not paid._**

**_Author's note: The fun version is you-know-where._**

**Chapter 2**

The next time Kurama woke, he was in his bed. His alarm went off, blaring the morning news at him. Something about an escaped convict somewhere. Kurama wasn't listening. He shut off the alarm and stood, stretching. It was Sunday. He didn't have to work. Thank goodness. It had all been a dream.

Kurama stood and headed to his bathroom, surprised to see Hiei there. "Good morning, Hiei." Kurama smiled. After that horrible dream, waking up to find another person in his apartment had quelled his anxiety somewhat. He wasn't as frightened.

"What are you doing, Kurama?" Hiei asked, staring at him. "Why aren't you fighting?"

Kurama was confused. He looked around. Everything was calm. Why did Hiei look like he was going to jump out of his skin? "Hiei...?" Kurama walked forward and touched Hiei's shoulder, hoping to calm him. Under his touch, Hiei seemed to relax significantly. It was a mere shrug of his shoulders but Kurama noticed it. He wasn't at all surprised when, moments later, Hiei grabbed him by the front of his shirt and kissed him hard. Even so, Kurama dropped his towel and wrapped his arms around Hiei, pulling the hiyoukai into his bedroom.

"Try to be quiet, Hiei. I'd prefer if you did not wake my neighbors."

"Your neighbors are gone, Kurama," said Hiei. "_You are alone here_."

Kurama woke with a start. He was still in the cave. Pinching himself, he realized, once again, he was awake. The delightful scene in his bedroom had been a dream. He was already so lonely as to have wet dreams about Hiei? Kurama was slightly disgusted with himself. Yes, he and Hiei had sex often enough but Hiei was never gentle like that. It was almost _wrong_. Hiei knew better than to be gentle with Kurama. Kurama would never stand for it. Apart from that, Kurama had been _far too_affectionate with him. That hadn't been like him at all.

Kurama rested his head in his hands for a moment, still curled up against the wall of the cave. This was pathetic. He had to figure out where everyone had gone. None of this made sense. Had he lost his mind?

Standing, Kurama straightened his clothes as best as he could but felt no shame walking through Makai with his pants in such a state. It wasn't like anyone was there to see him. Again, Kurama felt a stab of panic in his heart. He tried to push the panic away and headed out of the cave. He wasn't going to let a dream unsettle him. He'd find out where everyone had gone soon.

The streets of Sarayashiki were still empty of people. Rather than getting used to the emptiness, it only became more profound as time went on. Kurama felt lonelier and lonelier. He glanced around, thinking he'd seen a shadow. His heart leapt, thinking of Hiei but when he looked at the space where he thought he'd seen the shadow again, it was gone.

It was strange. Kurama felt like he'd been alone for a week. Or perhaps not quite that long. The sun never seemed to set. Maybe he was asleep when it happened. When he looked down at himself, he was wearing a completely different outfit but he didn't remember having gone home to shower. That was... odd.

"You _idiot_!" Kurama jumped. He was awake wasn't he? He looked over his shoulder. He was home now wasn't he? No. He was looking at Kuwabara's TV now. When had he gone to Kuwabara's house. "Are you _listening now_, you fool?"

Kurama knelt in front of the TV, staring at it with awe. The television was blank but there was a flickering quality to the blackness and Hiei's voice came through clearly. "Have I... Have I lost my mind?" Kurama cringed again at the sound of his own voice. It sounded far too loud to his ears in the silence and yet still lacking in any sort of power.

"Quit mopeing. You are stronger than this."

Kurama touched the television. "What's... What is this? Am I still dreaming?"

"Just listen. You've been..." There was nothing but static for a moment and then Kurama no longer heard Hiei's voice.

"Hiei?" Kurama waited. Nothing but the high-pitched buzzing noise was coming from the tv anymore. Kurama strained his ears. He could almost hear Hiei's voice but couldn't make out what the hiyoukai was saying. Then the screen went completely blank and utter silence fell once more. "Hiei? _Hiei_?! Come back!"

It was too late. Kurama had already gone mad from the loneliness.

_I keep walking. Even now. How long has it been? Time is strange here. No matter how long I gaze at the sky, the position of the sun never changes. Once in awhile, I can almost feel a breeze and voices are carried to me on the phantom wind. I cannot hear what they say. I am so alone. Why am I so alone?_

_Why won't anyone save me? Can I even be saved anymore?_

It was a daisy. Kurama kept staring at it, feeling completely foolish. A _daisy_. But it reminded him so much of Kuwabara. What a strange association to make with the redhead. Nothing else felt like any of his friends. The television in Kuwabara's home had lingering traces of Hiei's youki. Or perhaps that was wishful thinking. Perhaps this daisy _was_Kuwabara. Kurama had long since decided he'd gone completely insane. The likeliest circumstance, in Kurama's mind, was that he was dead and this was hell. He knew he hadn't earned a less severe punishment than this. Trapped forever in this place where the plants didn't know his name; stuck in this pretty human form he loathed so much. It was painful trying to revert. Kurama felt that if he could become a fox, he could endure this torture far more easily. He could run to the Makai hills and play until his brain gave in fully to the madness of this place.

For now, Kurama gently toyed with the flower that so reminded him of his friend. He missed Kuwabara. And Yuusuke. And Hiei. His mother, stepfather and little brother too. He wondered if they missed him. Kurama played with the petals, wanting to scream. The flower wasn't listening to him. He wanted it to grow, to transform into Kuwabara. He wanted Kuwabara to come rescue him. Or Yuusuke. Or Hiei. How wonderful it would be if that were possible. How nice to be able to see his friends again. "I miss you," Kurama muttered to the daisy. "I miss you, and Yuusuke. I do not know who I miss most of all. Probably my m-mother." Kurama gasped, surprised that his voice had caught in his throat. Regardless of the fact he was only talking to a _flower_, Kurama felt better. Less afraid, less alone. He wasn't sure what he'd do if the flower started talking back. Probably eat it.

Kurama laughed. "I haven't eaten in days. Or months, or perhaps hours. I have no idea how long I've been here... It seems I don't need to. My body feels no hunger. Only anxiety and fatigue. This is a strange place." Kurama started absently shredding the grass around the flower. This field was the prettiest place he'd found but even its beauty, even the flowers and trees and cloudless sky felt painful and cruel. "Have I died, Kuwabara-kun? Is this some horrible dream? Or have all the living creatures on Earth perished save for myself? It seems too cruel a fate. Even for someone as awful as myself."

Kurama touched the flower again. He felt better once more. "I should go find Yuusuke. I expect you would not mind coming with me." Kurama very gently unearthed the daisy, making sure it had enough damp soil to stay alive. None of the plants here ever seemed to change. Kurama was tempted to rip down a tree with his bare hands just to see what would happen. He almost wept when he glanced over his shoulder and saw a new daisy to replace the one in his hands.

_The daisy hasn't died. It's still sitting there, on top of Kuwabara-kun's television. I wonder if Hiei and Kuwabara are irritated to be in such close proximity. I must find humor somewhere. I still have not found Yuusuke. Perhaps if I went to his apartment, he would be there._

Kurama hadn't been in Yuusuke's apartment for awhile. He mostly stayed in Kuwabara's home because that was where he sometimes thought he heard Hiei's voice coming from the television. Hiei had been quiet since the first time. Kurama wasn't sure how long it had been since he'd heard Hiei's voice.

Kurama nearly jumped out of his skin when he walked into Yuusuke's house and saw Yuusuke, standing there wrapped in that silly afghan. "Why did you leave, Kurama?" Yuusuke's voice was a whisper. He looked so sad. Yuusuke never looked this sad. "Why did you have to go?"

Kurama trembled slightly. He wanted to answer but he was too afraid of this odd, spectral Yuusuke standing before him. Kurama didn't even remember opening the door to Yuusuke's apartment anymore. He'd completely forgotten how he'd gotten there. Kurama closed his eyes, hard, half hoping Yuusuke would be gone when he opened them but half-hoping he'd still be there.

He was. And now Kurama's own mother was standing next to Yuusuke, weeping into her hands. And her tears were bloody. Kurama closed his eyes again. _Wake up, Kurama. Wake up!_

Kurama snapped awake. He was lying on Kuwabara's living room floor. What had woken him up?

"Kurama!"

Kurama looked at the television again. Was this another dream? Or was any of it real? "What, Hiei?" Kurama didn't bother trying to hide his irritation. He didn't want to talk to the television again right now.

"Get out of this thing!" Hiei sounded really angry. "Why must you continually _ignore me_when I speak to you. I have been shouting for several minutes."

"You're not real, Hiei. You're just a television." Kurama glanced at the daisy on top of Hiei. _On top of the television_. "Please stop talking to me. I've already lost my mind."

"This is hopeless, oaf. I told you he wasn't listening." The television screen went back to its usual blank screen and high pitched buzzing. Kurama unplugged it but the sound didn't go away. That sound followed him everywhere now.

_I wonder if I can die. I wonder if I can leap off a tall building and be dead. I think I already tried that yesterday. But the building turned into a toy. Yes. I remember now. This world won't even let me leave it through death. _

"Kuwabara-kun, I still have not found Yuusuke," Kurama said to the daisy. He was still lying on the floor where he'd collapsed after unplugging the television. Unless he'd gotten up and done something between then and now that he'd forgotten. It felt like it had been years that he was laying here. "I wonder where he is. I am too frightened to visit his home. I am not sure if that was a nightmare or a vision. I swear I can smell the blood. Even now. Maybe it is my own. Perhaps I really am dying." Kurama laughed. It was hollow and sounded wrong in the air but he laughed anyway. Laughed until he was half sick but even if he _could_ throw up, there was nothing to vomit. There was still food everywhere. Everything was unchanging, even when Kurama tried to change it himself. The only things he'd managed were to put that ludicrous daisy on top of Hiei. On top of the _television_. Kurama laughed again, thinking of Hiei with a daisy on his head. Or better yet, Kuwabara riding on Hiei's shoulders. It was so funny!

"Do me a favor and never climb atop Hiei." Kurama smiled, eyes still closed. "I will be forced to kill you if you ever do."

When he woke, Hiei was there again. But Kurama had learned by now that the presence of his friends was either a cruel dream, a nightmare or a hallucination. He couldn't tell them apart anymore. "Hello, Hiei." Kurama didn't move, just stared up at Hiei from the floor, smiling vacantly. "Come to haunt me again?"

"You're being ridiculous." Hiei sat beside Kurama's head and stared at him. "Get up off the floor. You are not a _rug_, you are a youkai."

"You're so funny, Hiei." Kurama reached up to touch Hiei's face, but Hiei flinched away. That was more like it. His last dream about Hiei had been strange. Hiei hadn't been himself. Kurama didn't even care that Hiei's skin kept turning green. "What a bizarre dream."

"You are awake this time, fool." Hiei scoffed, adjusting his boots. "Why have you put a flower on top of the television?"

"Do not be rude, Hiei. I know you are not a fan of Kuwabara-kun but that seemed the best place to keep him." Kurama ran his fingertips over Hiei's arm and Hiei jerked away again.

"You are insane. You've been here barely a day and your brain is already addled. I expect better from you."

"It has to have been years by now, Hiei." Kurama folded his hands over his chest. "You are a very solid dream."

"I am not a _dream_!"

"If this is not a dream, why does everything look so colorful?" Kurama looked at Hiei and watched him glance around at the walls.

"Everything is gray." Hiei sounded alarmed now. "What colors? This world isn't _real_. It is in your mind. Only the daisy looks real because you mean it to."

"I know that." Kurama sat up, looking at Hiei. He was sitting directly in front of the television now. Kurama wanted to weep.

"Don't fall asleep _again_!"

"I was already sleeping."

_Much as I loathe to admit it, I believe I will require your help. _

Kurama reached out and touched Hiei again. Hiei scowled but relented finally. Hiei stopped speaking. He stopped doing much of anything aside from responding to Kurama's kisses.

Kurama broke apart from Hiei to trail his fingertips over Hiei's arms again but he froze, gaping at the hiyoukai.

"Hiei... Why on _Earth_would you change into a maid costume?"

"Don't you like it, Kurama-sama?" Kurama watched Hiei curtsey and felt like vomitting. "I'm wearing it for you..."

"..." Kurama stared at Hiei for another long moment. "You... You look like a prepubescent GIRL, Hiei. That's... _disgusting_."

"You don't like it?" 'Hiei' flounced a little. "_Really_, Kurama-sama?"

"No. I do not. What in the gods...? I am dreaming." Kurama slapped himself in the face to wake himself up. "This is a terrible, terrible nightmare. I am not sure who you are supposed to be, but you are _not_Hiei."

Kurama sat up and was awake, staring at Hiei again. But he was silent and still this time, still sitting in the same place Kurama had left him, with that absurd daisy on his head. Kurama lifted the daisy off of Hiei's head. "It did not suit, you Hiei. Neither did the maid outfit. What a horrible dream." Kurama shuddered and moved to the couch, placing Kuwabara next to him. "Honestly, Kuwabara-kun, I am quite glad that you cannot read minds."

Kuwabara said nothing in response. Because Kuwabara was a _daisy_.


	3. Chapter 3

**_Disclaimer: Not mine_**

**_Chapter 3_**

"Peripety." Kurama muttered to Kuwabara. Kuwabara stared vacantly back at Kurama from his place on the couch the way he always did nowadays. His petals had yet to wilt, he looked pleasantly happy, just like Kurama remembered him. "That is what is happening. Do you like how I have arranged your home?" Kurama glanced at Kuwabara again, smiling. "Yes, I thought so... Hiei does not seem happy here." Kurama looked over at Hiei. "You've become boxy and square and far too shiny, Hiei. Please stop making that incessant buzzing sound. It is quite disturbing." Kurama waited, then sighed. "Apparently you cannot, even though I have unplugged you." Kurama leaned back against the couch and closed his eyes briefly. When he opened them again, Kuwabara was gone and Hiei had stood up from his perch on the floor. "That is better, Hiei. You look significantly more like yourself and less like a paracosm this way."

Hiei strode over to the couch and pushed Kurama against it, hands on his shoulders and nipped at the base of the kitsune's neck. Kurama let out a gasp. "Hiei... w-we are in Kuwabara-kun's living room." Hiei said nothing, just kept kissing Kurama and nipping at him. "Please say something, Hiei..."

Hiei remained silent and ran his claws over Kurama's arms. Kurama sighed. "You are being gentle again..." Even though Kurama was bleeding, he could barely feel it. "Hiei. Please say something. I miss your voice."

"Wake up, damn you!" Was followed by an actual pain in Kurama's cheek. Kurama snapped awake. He hadn't realized he'd drifted off again. Hiei looked more solid now, more real and animated. Kurama glanced at the television. It was gone. "Good. Now come with me."

"I'd rather not." Kurama reached for Hiei's shirt to try to tug it off of him. Hiei slapped his hands away. "What are you doing? Leave my shirt be. Let's go."

Kurama nearly jumped when the daisy beside him -_Kuwabara-_ started stammering and fell off the couch, bright red in the face. "I am sorry, Kuwabara-kun, I forgot you were here."

"Th-tha-that's okay!" Kuwabara stuttered back, looking far more real now, less like a daisy. "We came t'rescue you."

"Oh?" Kurama folded his arms over his chest and closed his eyes but Hiei slapped him again. "You are being very rude in this dream, Hiei."

"_You are not dreaming this!_" Hiei growled. "We've come to rescue you, as the oaf said. Have you any idea how difficult it has been to break through your defenses? You have not been listening. Falling 'asleep' at random times. I have stood beside you, shouting for _hours_."

"It's true!" Kuwabara said, nodding. "Hiei's been a wreck ever since y'got captured! Nearly bit off Urameshi's head when he couldn't tell 'im what was goin' on." Kuwabara stood and offered Kurama a hand to help him up. "This ain't a dream, Kurama." Kuwabara turned a bit red in the face at this. "I-I know y'been havin' bad dreams. It's 'cause of th'tree..."

"Tree?" Kurama tilted his head to one side, staring at Kuwabara. "What a peculiar dream..."

"You. Are not. Asleep." Hiei's teeth were gritted. He sounded beyond enraged now. Almost calm. It scared Kurama somewhat. "Come with us. We must get you out of here." Hiei glanced around. "What is this place supposed to be?"

"I think it's my house," Kuwabara replied. "Looks like it's made'a cardboard, though... TV and th'daisy are th'only things that look real..."

Hiei let out an aggravated noise through his nose. "Let's go, Kurama. Enough of this foolishness. I would have assumed you were smart enough to fight off your own weapon."

"I do not want to leave. It is nice here." Kurama wanted to weep. He was so crazy that his hallucinations felt real. Kuwabara was speaking to him, sounding exactly as he remembered. Hiei too, although, he'd heard Hiei's voice often enough on the wind.

"C-come with us, Kurama." Kuwabara rubbed his hands together, looking morose suddenly. "I-I know y'wanna end this. We can help ya end it."

"Really?" That piqued Kurama's interest, he looked up at Kuwabara once more and allowed the redhead to help him to his feet, clinging to Kuwabara harder than he would normally because Kuwabara felt _warm_ and real.

_They can help me die? I will follow them. Even if this is a cruel dream once more. My friends have finally come for me. I do not mind this hallucination. Kuwabara-kun and Hiei look more real than the streets we're walking through. They keep speaking to me but I have no desire to answer any longer. I am content to follow wherever they lead me._

"He's been quiet fer awhile, Hiei." Kuwabara looked back at Kurama, worried. "How long we been walkin'?"

Hiei blew out a low breath and stared straight ahead. "I do not know. Do not ask stupid questions."

"Never thought th'inside'a Kurama's head would look so... lonely." Kuwabara looked at Kurama, wishing the kitsune would let go. It was really weird for Kurama to _cling_ like that. "Thought th'Sinning Tree made you hallucinate violence."

Hiei scowled at Kuwabara. "Once again, you prove how simple-minded you are. Clearly, it makes you hallucinate whatever is the strongest _feeling_ you have at the time."

Kuwabara looked around again and was suddenly very sad. "That means Kurama's lonely."

"It means he is a _fool_. At least he is complacent." Hiei looked around at the street they were on, there was a childish drawing of Yuusuke's apartment on laying in gray grass where Yuusuke's home should be. "He has the mind of a _child_ now. When I first arrived, this place looked more solid and realistic. Your home is the only place that looked real at all."

"Yeah." Kuwabara winced. The Yukimura diner was a drawing just like Yuusuke's house. "Surprised _we_ look real, considerin'... I mean, y'look kinda... _square_."

Hiei looked at Kuwabara for a moment then scoffed. "Kurama imagines you far more attractive than you are. Perhaps because he was speaking to a flower, behaving as though it were you." Hiei reached for his sword and was irritated to find a TV antenna instead. He sighed. "He thought I was the _television_."

Kuwabara wanted to laugh but didn't. It was creepy, Hiei looked mostly like himself except for being boxy and having a plug for a "tail." "Guess he don't see you as bein' a real looker..."

Hiei scowled but said nothing, he looked at Kurama. "Why is he smiling like that?"

Kuwabara looked. Kurama's expression _was_ pretty nerve-wracking. "Dunno. We gotta get 'im outta here. I remember th'way to Demon's Door cave. I think if we get 'im there an' fight th'tree, we can get him out of it."

"Something he _should have done_ himself." Hiei looked at his hands. "I will tear the tree off of him. You stay put and make sure he does not do anything foolish."

The trek to the cave took longer than Kuwabara wanted. The areas of human world Kurama hadn't visited yet in his mind looked like white paper with drawings where things should be, they passed a field that looked completely fake safe for one highly realistic daisy growing out of a large sheet of white paper, but the cave looked real enough. Kuwabara stared at it. He didn't like the looks of that cave and neither did Kurama apparently. "No!" Kurama shouted, suddenly "Don't make me go inside!"

"I-it's okay, Kurama. We're here! M-me an' Hiei will protect ya." Kuwabara rubbed Kurama's back, feeling scared witless. Kurama was supposed to be _strong_, not fearful. It made him angry. Angrier than he'd been in a _while_. How dare those brats do this to Kurama? "Urameshi's already taken care'a th'jerks that trapped ya. H-he's just... gotta..."

"Go in the cave, Kurama." Hiei grabbed Kurama's wrist and pulled on him, half-dragging the kitsune into the cave.

"H-hey! Y'oughta be more gentle with him!" Even in this situation, Kuwabara couldn't help but get annoyed at Hiei for being rough with Kurama. Especially since it was obvious Kurama really _liked_ Hiei!

"Kurama does not want me to be gentle." Hiei gave Kuwabara a murderous look but kept walking and Kuwabara had no choice but to follow. Silently.

Details of the cave stood out more the more they walked. It wasn't hard to find the correct path, it was lit by the lamp plants Kurama had thrown in the cave the first time they'd visited this particular place, although that cave had been real and not a manifestation of Kurama's memory of it. Which was good, because they were going to the same part of the cave. Kurama had stopped protesting, he just shuffled along beside Hiei, occasionally trying to tug away and whimpering when Hiei only tightened his hold. "Hiei... Let me-"

"No," Hiei snapped. "I have had enough of your simpering and emotional nonsense. I endured you weeping over the state of Kurama's home even though this is _only his imagination_."

"It looked like he ripped it t'pieces with his bare hands, Hiei!" Kuwabara exclaimed. "Quit bein' such an ass! Besides-"

Hiei turned in the middle of the cave and pulled out the tv antenna in the hilt at his side, pointing it at Kuwabara. "Be silent or I will make what I am about to do to Elder Toguro look like a gentle shove when I am done with you."

Kuwabara fell silent only because Hiei looked completely calm when he said that.

"Where is the sinning tree, Kurama?" Hiei suddenly snapped. Kurama whimpered and backed away. "Terrific. He is too frightened to _speak_."

"Maybe if you'd stop _yellin'_ at him!" Kuwabara gave Hiei a righteously angry look and gently tugged Kurama away. "Don't pay attention t'him, Kurama. He's jus' upset 'cause y'got hurt."

"I am not injured," Kurama muttered. It was the first coherent thing he'd said in hours. "Do not worry about my wounds. Yuusuke needs you more than I."

Kuwabara looked Kurama over. He had to disagree. Kurama looked like he'd been starved and beaten which was nothing to what the tree was currently doing to his human body. "We gotta get him outta here, Hiei. Dunno if he can take much more."

"That's what I've been _saying_ you enormous incompetent!" Hiei darted ahead, Kuwabara followed with one arm around Kurama. Kurama seemed to get more frightened as they walked but Kuwabara kept giving him muttered reassurances, telling him he'd be okay.

A loud explosion alerted Kuwabara to the fact that Hiei had found the tree just up ahead.

**_Please remember to review!_**


	4. Chapter 4

**_Author's note: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS GORE, AND BODY HORROR, other warnings at the bottom. It's a sad chapter. I suggest not reading it if you're in any kind of dark mood. IF YOU CANNOT HANDLE GORE, I SUGGEST THAT WHEN YOU REACH "Hiei considered himself to be a comrade to pain" that you ctrl + F to "There was barely time for Yuusuke to register what happened." Also, the gore and body horror was written by my beautiful fiancée and beta haskap over at deviantART. A big thank you for her contribution and here's to hoping it doesn't get me banned from ffnet!_**

**_Chapter 4_**

"Wake up, damnit!" Yuusuke's voice echoed off the walls and sounded unnaturally loud in the cave. Kurama was out of the tree but he still wasn't _moving_. Not a twitch, not even a slight rise and fall of his chest that Yuusuke could see. Nothing. "Kurama, come on. Not like this... Not now. _Please_."

Kuwabara stood and was at Yuusuke's side in a moment. "What's goin' on? How come he ain't awake yet?"

"I don't... I don't think he's breathing..." Yuusuke stood up and backed away. "Wh-what do I do? F-first they attacked my _mom_-"

"Atsuko-san is okay, Urameshi!" Kuwabara hesitantly patted Yuusuke on the shoulder. "Our families're all fine, remember? They're with Botan-san at Genkai's."

"Kurama, you BASTARD, wake up!" Yuusuke wasn't listening. He knelt beside Kurama's prone form and touched his friend's shoulder. Kurama stirred slightly.

"I... I am..." Kurama's eyelashes fluttered but he didn't open his eyes. "I am fine, Yuusuke..."

"You're NOT fine, stop talking, damnit!" Yuusuke helped Kurama sit up against the wall of the cave and started pacing back and forth. "How the hell are we supposed to get him to Yukina, huh? Are you gonna carry him 30 miles? Would he even _survive_?"

"I do not..." Kurama closed his eyes. "Yuusuke... I am alright. Please calm down. I am far sturdier than I look."

"SHUT UP, KURAMA, JUST SHUT UP, I CAN'T TALK ABOUT THIS RIGHT NOW, I GOTTA GO KILL THAT BASTARD-"

"You will do no such thing." Hiei unsheathed his sword. Up until now, he'd been standing in the corner, silently observing Yuusuke's panic. This was too much, however. He held his sword to Yuusuke's throat, utterly calm, the look in his eyes mostly blank. Yuusuke froze and Hiei's sword bit slightly into his skin, just the top layer, enough to make a bead of blood appear before the wound closed on its own.

Kuwabara started forward but Hiei merely turned his sword on the redhead in turn. "You will stay beside Kurama while I deal with the vermin. It is already on its way here."

"Who said YOU get to kill him?" Yuusuke demanded but Kuwabara grabbed Yuusuke's arm before Yuusuke could advance on Hiei.

"Let him do it, Yuusuke. Y'didn't see what that tree did t'Kurama's brain. This is Hiei's fight." Kuwabara was defending Hiei. _Kuwabara_ was defending _Hiei_. What was the world coming to? Well, it was better if Yuusuke didn't ponder that too closely right now.

For the first time in his entire life, Yuusuke grabbed Kuwabara by the hand and dragged him back over to Kurama. Neither Yuusuke nor Kuwabara were any good at binding wounds but they did the best they could, cleaning them with some of their spare water and a first aid kit. There were fingernail scratches up and down Kurama's arms and a weird, circular wound near the nape of Kurama's neck. "Hiei... what-?"

"Toguro bit him, obviously." Hiei adjusted his sheath, standing at the mouth of the cave. "In any case, Kurama did not do that to himself."

"I don't get it," Yuusuke muttered to Kurama. "How did you get here, Kurama? If Toguro bit you, why'd he bother hooking you up to this tree? He coulda killed you while he had you before."

"I do not remember how I got here, Yuusuke." Kurama reached up and grasped Yuusuke's shirt. He was so weak. It made Yuusuke panic a little. "I do not remember... much."

"What's the last thing you _do _remember?" Kuwabara asked, kneeling on Kurama's other side.

"Going to bed on a calm Sunday evening. I visited you at college the day before." Kurama coughed slightly. "I woke up the next day and the world was empty. I suppose that was part of the hallucination."

Kuwabara caught Yuusuke's gaze. Kuwabara had graduated three months earlier.

"Are you still having trouble with Calculus?" Kurama opened his eyes and looked at Kuwabara.

"No. I understand it all now. Thanks fer helpin' me." Kuwabara stood in front of Kurama and Yuusuke did the same. "Just stay quiet, Kurama. Don't move."

"He has no idea what's going on," Yuusuke muttered so softly Kuwabara could barely catch it.

Kuwabara shifted and kicked some rocks away from his feet. "Worry about that later."

There was a rumbling sound, a horrible laughter echoed down the cave walls but Toguro's smell hit all of them before the sound of his voice. Kurama recoiled slightly before passing out against the wall of the cave. Neither Yuusuke nor Kuwabara noticed the kitsune becoming still, they were too busy watching Toguro's only entrance.

Unfortunately for them, Toguro was sneaky and stealth, he managed to sneak up on them. Kuwabara saw him first and summoned his reiken in time to block _most_ of Toguro's long fingers from hitting him. The bastard was still after Kurama! Kuwabara sustained a few scratches before, in a movement that was too fast for any of them to see, Hiei grabbed Toguro and tore him away from his three allies, slamming the disgusting creature against the cave wall before he began slowly, methodically torturing him to death. Kuwabara caught a flash of Hiei's utterly _serene _expression before looking away. He didn't want to see this. And he trusted Hiei to get rid of Toguro for all of them. Hopefully before their other pursuers caught up.

Hiei considered himself a kind of comrade with pain. He had known it for so many decades that it was now an old, dear friend of his. Hiei knew pain better than he knew himself, and was more than delighted to introduce it to Toguro.

He said nothing as he had burnt Toguro's arms and legs off, even as the youkai _taunted_ him. Hiei ignored his words _and_ screeches, and when Toguro's flesh had been reduced to ashes, Hiei began to skin him.

A quick Y-shaped incision made on Toguro's chest and Hiei peeled one of the edges free of muscle and bone before it could seal up. He paid no mind to the blood gushing over his hands as he passed one hand over the muscle that was exposed. Burning it to a crisp so Toguro's skin could not reattach and hardly paused before shoving his hand through fat and muscle.

Hiei actually _smiled_ as Toguro let out visceral noises of agony while the hiyoukai pulled his intestines loose, using black fire to obliterate any chance of healing. When he had emptied Toguro's abdominal cavity and caused his lungs to burst with steam did Hiei stand and _laugh_, "Now, you will become little less than a stench in the air," Said with a smile, while the rock beneath them cracked and popped, the air itself burning along with every atom of Toguro's flesh and even his blood.

* * *

There was barely time for Yuusuke to register anything that had happened between Hiei and Toguro, however. The stench still lingered in the air and the cave was silent once more but Yuusuke paid attention to none of that. "W-wake up, Kurama, this isn't funny."

"Yuusuke, we gotta _go_," Kuwabara muttered.

"Kurama. Come on, man." Yuusuke gently shook Kurama but the kitsune didn't stir. He was so cold. He looked fragile and empty. Yuusuke was too scared to listen for a heartbeat. "Kurama, come on, man. W-we gotta go to Makai and get you fixed up. I-I'm sure Yomi'll help us. Just... pl-please..."

"_Yuusuke_!"

"He's not _breathing_, Kuwabara! He's really not _breathing_!" Yuusuke clutched Kurama's shoulders, then reached over to feel his neck for a heartbeat. Kurama's human form always had a heartbeat before. If he was still alive-

Nothing. Kurama was gone. "No. Kurama, please. _No_."

"The SDF is coming. We gotta _go_." Kuwabara grabbed Yuusuke's shoulder, hiding his own agony. He had to get Yuusuke out of here or the SDF would kill them all. "They musta tracked us 'cause of Hiei's youki."

"Let them come." Yuusuke stood up and shook Kuwabara off, his voice hollow, his eyes as dead as Kurama's. "This is THEIR fault!" The ground shook, Yuusuke's markings flared over his skin, his hair grew at an alarming rate and the cave around them echoed with an eerie wailing. "He's my _brother_, Kuwabara! What am I gonna do?!"

"Get him out of here!" Hiei shouted as the cave began to collapse. He stood beside Kurama's corpse, youki flaring hot. The rocks that fell from the walls disintegrated and none hit Kurama's body. "Get him out NOW, Kuwabara!"

"I'll kill them all! Let them come! LET THEM SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THEY FUCK WITH ME!"

The cave was going to collapse. Yuusuke had completely lost it, Hiei was, for whatever reason, _still standing there_ just making sure that the rocks didn't hit Kurama's body. Kuwabara didn't have time to process any of it. He grabbed Yuusuke around the waist, letting him kick, scream and claw at him, not caring that he was bleeding in the _least_ or that the air smelled like Toguro's burned flesh. He didn't even get a chance to cry over Kurama. Kuwabara summoned his jigentou, cut a hole in reality and dragged Yuusuke through.

Half of the Forest of Fools was destroyed before Yuusuke managed to calm down enough to collapse against Kuwabara. Sleeping and utterly drained. It was only then that Kuwabara allowed himself to cry, silently so as not to wake Yuusuke.

**_Please be kind and review!_**

**_Additional Warnings:_**

**_Character Death_**


	5. Chapter 5

**_Hey, all! Sorry this was so late! Also sorry I left such a painful cliffhanger there! This story is not finished. Not even close. It's going to end up being significantly longer than this. Thanks for reading, even if you haven't reviewed yet!_**

**_Chapter Five_**

It was no surprise to Hiei that Yukina was waiting for him at the entrance to the temple. He ignored her concern, ignored her asking about the blood he was covered with and her fretting over how filthy he was. "Tell the oaf's sister and the other girl to keep Kurama's mother inside. Meet me in the forest with spare clothing. Bring Botan." That was all Hiei said, then he turned around and headed back to where he'd left Kurama's body.

He hadn't wanted to walk away from Kurama's body for even those few moments. It had been hard enough to set it down after he'd rescued it from the cave. He stood there, unmoving and not looking at Kurama's body. It looked horrible. Blemished. Nothing like what it had in life. Hiei scoffed at the memory of once hearing someone say that in death, people looked peaceful. Kurama didn't look peaceful; he looked dead.

The gasp from Yukina and a warbling _sound _out of Botan broke Hiei's silent reverie. He looked up at Botan, expression defiant. "His soul has not left his body."

Yukina knelt beside Kurama, looking stricken. "Kurama-san... b-but... _how_?"

"We do not know." Hiei folded his arms over his chest.

"Where is my brother?!" Shizuru's booming voice echoed through the forest as she rushed to Hiei. "We haven't had news in _days_. I want to know what's going on!" She stopped short of the clearing when she caught sight of Kurama. "What the hell, Hiei?"

"You should be inside making sure his mother does not see him like this." Hiei snapped, giving Shizuru a venomous look.

"Bite me." She lit a cigarette and blew smoke at Hiei. "Keiko's taking care of it. You're lucky she trusts you enough to do what you say. I sure as hell don't, even if you've been running around with my idiot brother for so long. Now. _Where is Kazuma_?"

"I do not know. He is in Makai somewhere with _Yuusuke._" That shut Shizuru up. Hiei had no time to prattle about plans and news.

"Hiei-san..." Botan stood beside Kurama's body, tears in her eyes. "You're right. H-his soul is still inside. This is... so odd."

"Yukina." Hiei turned to his sister, his expression an iota softer than when he'd been glaring at Shizuru. "Attempt to heal him."

"I..." Yukina looked from Hiei to Botan. "I do not see how that will do any good." Even so, she knelt beside Kurama to flood him with her healing youki, glancing up for only a moment when Hiei wandered off behind some trees to change into the outfit she'd brought him and burn his spare clothing.

When Hiei returned to the clearing, he watched as everyone took a step away from Kurama. Even after torturing Toguro to death, Hiei began to feel a bit sick to his stomach to see the way Kurama's body contorted and twisted. Yukina and Botan both hid their faces against Shizuru but Shizuru kept her eyes on Hiei.

There was always a smoke-screen when Kurama transformed. He always used a powdered fungus to hide how hideous it looked so even Hiei had never seen it. His bones lengthening, the sickening noises of joints popping out of place and then back again, the way his skin rippled and stretched; it looked excruciating. When it was done and Kurama lay still once more, his body was far taller, had a tail, long silver hair and fox ears. "Ah..." Shizuru muttered. "He pulled a _Yuusuke_..."

A moment of silence was broken suddenly when Kurama sat up, coughing. "How long was I asleep?" he asked. He looked down at himself and only Hiei caught the look of slight _panic_. "What happened?"

Hiei reached out for Kurama's hand to haul Kurama to his feet, which Kurama accepted, looking bewildered.

"How would I know?" Hiei asked, eyebrow raised and tapping his foot. "We have to go find the idiot and Yuusuke before Yuusuke destroys half of Makai _mourning_ you."

"Hiei... What-?" Kurama cut himself short. He turned around, not seeing the way Hiei stopped to watch.

"Shuuichi?" Shiori approached Kurama from behind some trees without hesitation and reached for his hand. She gave Kurama a look of pure, motherly concern.

"M-mother? You ought to have stayed inside-" Kurama jerked his hands upward slightly before letting them fall. It was pointless to try to hide his ears!

"Botan-san and Yukina-san have been... filling me in. Letting me know why I am here." Shiori gave Kurama an appraising look. That look caused Kurama, the legendary bandit to _wince_. "They left out the part about _you_ being a... a youkai was it?" She folded her arms over her chest and Hiei wanted to chuckle at the way Kurama looked like a small child having been caught stealing cookies. "I would like an explanation, Shuuichi."

"I... y-you see, Mother..." For once in his life, Kurama was, momentarily, at a loss for words. "I have... been hiding a terrible secret from you all my life. I am _not_ human, clearly. I am a kitsune who nearly died, my soul escaped to living world and I... possessed a fetus inside of you before it was capable of attaining a soul. I did not kill your son." Kurama looked down at his feet. "Please believe that."

"As far as I am concerned." Shiori stepped forward, her hands on Kurama's elbows because that was about as high as she could even _reach_. "You are and always have been, my son. It doesn't matter to me if you are a bit different, my Shuuichi." She wrapped her arms around Kurama and held him tight. "I just wish you would have told me sooner."

"I... I am sorry." Kurama held Shiori for a few moments before drawing away. "I have to go, you see. Yuusuke thinks I have _died_. I have to set him right on that score."

"He thinks... what? Shuuichi... Have you been doing something reckless?" Shiori stood, hands on hips, tone suddenly chastising. "I want a full explanation when you return from this... trip."

"We do not know how long it will be." Hiei interjected. "We must leave now." Hiei grabbed Kurama by the elbow and started tugging him along.

"Pardon me, sir." Shiori stepped in front of Hiei. "I would like to say a proper farewell to my son before he leaves to go back into hiding." Hiei rolled his eyes and stepped away, allowing Shiori to give Kurama a goodbye hug. He was tempted to roll his eyes _again_ when she told Kurama she loved him and asked him to try to be safe. It was sickening.

* * *

"Urameshi..." Kuwabara was tired. His mouth was dry and they were _lost_. They'd had to leave that cave in such a rush, Kuwabara hadn't had time to grab any of their supplies. All he'd managed to do was set up a shoddy shelter under a tree and tried to hide his reiki as best he could. Even if most youkai didn't go out of their way to hunt humans, he was still sort of a sitting duck here! Plus, he'd finally noticed the scratches Toguro had left on him and he really wished Kurama or Yukina were there to heal him.

He felt a pang of sadness just thinking about the kitsune and shoved Kurama from his thoughts for the time being. "Urameshi, get up. Y'been asleep fer almost a day."

"Leave me alone, Kuwabara." Yuusuke just rolled over on the grass and stared up at the sky. "You don't need me awake right now. I'll get up if you're attacked."

"Some help _you_ are!" Kuwabara shoved Yuusuke. "Get up. We can't stay here. We gotta keep moving."

"This is the first place Hiei will look for us. I _doubt_ the SDF'll be here in a hurry." Yuusuke sat up finally and gave Kuwabara a stern look. "What are _you_ doing here anyways? You should be in Ningenkai. At the temple. With the _rest _of the humans."

"Fuck you, Urameshi! I saved yer damn life back there!" Kuwabara grouched, crossing his arms.

"I didn't ask you to." Yuusuke stood up.

Kuwabara was silent for a moment before uncrossing his arms and standing up, making a half-hearted comforting motion toward Yuusuke. "I loved Kurama just as much as you did but he wouldn't want us t'just lay here and die just 'cause..." Kuwabara shook his head. "Y'blew up half the forest. If the SDF comes by, they'll find us real fast. It's a dead giveaway. Plus all that youki y'were lettin' off. Surprised I didn't get knocked out from it. Sheesh..."

"If you are found, it will be because you are _shouting_, Kuwabara-kun." Yuusuke and Kuwabara both snapped to attention, shocked to hear Kurama's voice. But it wasn't Kurama's. It was deeper and-

"Oh damn, how'd y'come back?!" Kuwabara dashed a few feet ahead.

"ARE YOU INSANE?!" Yuusuke hurried forward and knocked Kuwabara on his ass, standing in front of Kuwabara. "After everything we've seen so far, you wanna just TRUST this guy because he looks and talks like Kurama? Hello! We just watched our friend d- he just... Kurama, is that really you?" Yuusuke squinted at Kurama. "Wha...?"

"It's him," Hiei said, stepping out of the shadows. "Now cease your disgusting simpering. The fool is right. We cannot stay in this forest."

"We are safe for the moment, Hiei." Kurama held out a hand to stop Hiei from objecting. "I want to know what has happened. Apparently, I have missed quite a lot."

"Y-yeah," Kuwabara said. "Last thing y'said y'remembered had t'be months and months ago."

"Kurama has no idea what happened to him?" Yuusuke stared at Kurama for a moment. "Well _fuck_, we only have some of it."

"There is another coup occurring." Hiei took out his sword and was flicking it about, apparently bored with this conversation. "Your toddler friend has enemies. They want him dead. They want all of his allies dead in order to keep them from _assisting_. As if I had any inclination to help him. I am no longer in his employ." Hiei looked up at Kurama. "While I could single-handedly murder the entire group of them, I see no reason to trouble myself with it."

"Shut up, Hiei," Yuusuke snapped. "You and me both know none of us is a match for even one of those SDF bastards. Not even working together. Let alone having _all of them_ chasing us at once."

"Yes, Hiei, there is a reason they are the youkai boogiemen." Kurama sat down on the ground, adjusting his toga. "If you recall, one of them killed me at the height of my power."

"I don't believe for a _moment_ that they were intelligent enough to catch you." Hiei stared at Kurama, for a few moments.. "It doesn't matter. It's too much trouble to fight them. I would prefer to stay out of the way for now.."

"This sucks." Yuusuke plopped down on the ground and started absent-mindedly shredding the grass in front of him. "All this crazy shit going on and I'm stuck here with no one to fight. Fuckin' stupid." He looked up at Kurama, his expression blank. "Glad you're not dead. Even if you kinda ripped off moves."

Kurama smiled. "That makes both of us, at least." Kurama pushed his hair behind his shoulder to get it out of his face, frowning slightly. "We are being tracked by the SDF. What on earth does Elder Toguro have to do with any of it?"

"That's what _I_ wanna know," said Kuwabara. He sat next to Yuusuke and the two of them exchanged brief, unreadable looks. "Hard t'believe we're gettin' tracked by some enemy and another one pops outta one of Kurama's best traps at the same time."

Kurama chuckled. "Hardly my best. It simply seemed most poetic." Kurama tapped his chin, thinking. A glance to the side let Kurama catch the way Hiei was staring at his tail. "Yes. I cannot see him escaping it on his own. The plant was mine and I was incapable of fighting it off."

"Are you okay now?" Yuusuke gave Kurama a once-over. "Nobody told me what was going on in your head but that tree is supposed to make you think you're fighting, right?"

"No. It was Kurama's worst fear." Kuwabara crossed his arms over his chest and glanced at Kurama. "Right?"

"No, actually..." Kurama shifted slightly, his smile looking more like a grimace now. "Loneliness is near the top. However... my worst fear already came to pass and it was far less horrible than expected." Kurama chuckled suddenly and Yuusuke and Kuwabara both gave him questioning looks. "My mother knows the truth of my identity now."

"You came out to your mom?" Yuusuke asked. Kuwabara punched Yuusuke's arm, glaring. "_What_?! I meant as a _youkai_ smart-ass! Jeez... guy can't tell a tasteless joke."

Kuwabara gave Yuusuke a cold look. "Don't be a dick, Urameshi."

"What?" Yuusuke turned toward Kuwabara, leaving a circular imprint in the dirt with his rear. "_What_?!"

"Kuwabara-kun, if this is about anything you may have seen in my mind, please do not let Yuusuke's thoughtlessness trouble you." Kurama stood up. "I assure you, I am used to it."

"See? He doesn't care." Yuusuke stood. "Let's get going. We gotta find somewhere safe-ish to camp."

Kurama and Kuwabara both stood as well. Hiei followed just behind Kurama, trying to ignore Yuusuke and Kuwabara's near-constant bickering.

It wasn't until they were nearly 10 miles from their original position that Kurama finally told everyone to stop. They were deep in the forest now. The trees were so massive and so close together, it was difficult to navigate through their branches. Luckily, Kurama's youki commanded respect and even reverence from the plants. With Kurama ahead of them, they had clear, flat ground to walk on and once they'd reached an area of mostly clear ground, they began to set up their camp.

Hiei had a fire going almost immediately. They had no tent or shelter but the trees were so huge, they couldn't see the sky when they looked up anyway. It was a little exposed but thanks to the fire, they'd at least not freeze overnight. Plus, Hiei had brought the duffle bag with him when he'd left the cave so they had some food and clean water.

"Hiei and I will hunt tomorrow," Kurama said once they'd all eaten and were sitting around the fire. "Neither of you are acquainted with Makai wilderness enough to know what plants are safe to eat. I will have to teach you."

"I think we should take Kuwabara back to the temple." Yuusuke nibbled on his thumbnail as he said this, leaning back against a tree, legs stretched out in front of him. "He's a human. He shouldn't be here. The miasma'll kill him in days."

"I can breathe just fine, Urameshi, _really_." Kuwabara gave Yuusuke an angry look. "Didn't have a problem durin' yer fight with Sensui, got no problem now." Kuwabara shrugged. "Even smells a little better this time."

Kurama gave Kuwabara a startled look but quickly looked back at his pathetic supper of canned peaches and jerky. "Kuwabara-kun is quite unusual for a human. I'm sure it will be fine, Yuusuke. If need be, I can borrow a respirator from Yomi."

Yuusuke laughed. "Yeah. Because Yomi's in a spot where he can help a criminal without getting his ass reamed by the SDF."

"He meant _steal_," Hiei explained.

"I would have every intention of returning it." Kurama closed his eyes and leaned backwards against the tree behind him. "Yuusuke? Would you mind keeping watch tonight? At least one of us should be awake while the others sleep."

"Yeah, sure. Slept all day anyhow." Yuusuke stood and climbed up the tree he'd been sitting in front of.

Hiei put out the fire and scowled when Kuwabara protested. "It draws too much attention." Hiei curled up on the still piping-hot coals and closed his eyes. He was asleep a moment later.

"We won't be cold," Kurama muttered to Kuwabara. "Hiei will keep the clearing a comfortable temperature even while asleep."

"Really?" Kuwabara gave Kurama a dubious look.

"If you get cold," Yuusuke called down. "Come up here, I'll keep you warm!"

"Shuddup, Urameshi! I don't need your help!" Kuwabara called back up.

"Be quiet," Hiei muttered sleepily. "Or I will skin all of you."

* * *

The next morning, Kuwabara woke to the smell of some kind of meat cooking. He was disoriented for a moment, forgetting where he was until Yuusuke pinched his nose shut. "Cut that out!" Kuwabara grumbled, slapping away Yuusuke's hand.

"You gotta wake up faster than _that_." Yuusuke scooted backwards on his ass, disturbing the ground. "We're in Makai. What if I'd been about to eat you?"

"You wouldn'ta pinched me first if y'were hungry." Kuwabara sat up and did his best to get the leaves and twigs out of his hair. Doing some awkward-looking stretches. "Besides. Anybody but you tried to wake me up like that'd get punched."

"You used to punch me anyways." Yuusuke wiggled his eyebrows at Kuwabara. "What changed?"

Kurama looked up from the skewers of meat he was roasting and gave Yuusuke a startled look.

"Quit being such an asshole, Urameshi." Kuwabara spat.

"Who's bein' an asshole?!" Yuusuke scowled at Kuwabara. "What did I even DO?"

"Stop shouting," Hiei growled.

"Shut up, Hiei!" Yuusuke and Kuwabara both shouted at the same time.

"Honestly," Kurama gave Kuwabara and Yuusuke an appraising look before smiling mischievously at Hiei. "I suspect that one of them will propose to the other rather soon."

Hiei and Yuusuke gave Kurama confused looks but Kuwabara stood up and walked off. "What the...?" Yuusuke muttered, glancing over his shoulder as Kuwabara stomped off into the forest.

Kurama sighed, standing. "Mind the food. My sense of humor is apparently going unappreciated..."

Kuwabara hadn't wandered off very far. Just into the forest and out of ear-shot so he could curse softly at a tree without being overheard. "Regardless of the tree's apparent lack of sentience, it honestly _does_ react to your negativity, Kuwabara-kun."

Kuwabara jumped slightly and turned around, giving Kurama a wide-eyed look. "S-sorry. I didn't hear ya."

"A dangerous thing to admit. You must be more vigilant." Kurama lead Kuwabara away a few more yards. "This whole thing must be awfully stressful for you. I apparently 'died'?"

"Yeah..." Kuwabara's shoulders slumped and he looked down at the ground. "Didn' know what t'do. Urameshi was freakin' out and Hiei told me t'grab him and take off. I didn't wanna leave ya but I thought Hiei'd attack me if I didn't."

"I would have done precisely as you did in your situation." Kurama touched the tree, looking at it for a moment. "Years prior, I would have left without any of you." When Kurama looked up and saw Kuwabara's disgusted and confused expression, he quickly waved his hands in front of his face. "That was a compliment."

"I don't... I don't really get it." Kuwabara scratched the back of his head, raising an eyebrow at Kurama.

"Oh?" Kurama grinned. "You are more of a man now than I ever was."

"Uh... thanks, I think." Kuwabara folded his arms over his chest and stared at the tree behind Kurama. "I-it ain't really my business but, uh... if y'wanna talk about what was goin' on in yer head..." Even in the semi-darkness, Kuwabara's flush was apparent. "I'll listen."

Kurama shook his head. "None of my dreams had any basis in reality."

"None? Really?" Kuwabara stood up a bit straighter but looked weary. "Y'mean... y'aren't... y'know... Hiei and..."

"Not yet."

Kuwabara blinked, then he frantically waved his hands in front of his face. "L-like I said, it ain't my business. I don-"

"Not to worry, Kuwabara-kun." Kurama smiled gently. "Is there something going on in _your_ mind that you need to share? With a being that can respond. I noticed you were already attempting to express your feelings to the tree, however. I doubt she was much help."

"I ain't freaked out about you likin-"

"Kuwabara-kun." Kurama crossed his arms.

"R-right... it's just..." Kuwabara kicked the dirt in front of his feet, struggling with the words. "Yuusuke's goin' through some stuff right now y'probably don't even know 'bout seein' as you forgot a couple months."

"I had not noticed anything bizarre about his behavior."

There was another pause. Kuwabara paced back and forth a few steps, gesturing slightly with his hands. Kurama waited. "I dunno if it's my business t'tell ya. I dunno if he ever told ya t'begin with."

"If it is bothering you this much, you are clearly worried for him. If you are worried, letting another person know may help alleviate the concern."

"Keiko broke up with him." The words seemed to explode from Kuwabara (albeit in a hushed voice) and he immediately turned away. "He sorta took it pretty hard."

"I can imagine why." Kurama uncrossed his arms and gave Kuwabara's shoulder a single awkward pat. "Did she give him a reason?"

"He wouldn't tell me. An' Yukimura didn't wanna talk 'bout it. Dunno, Kurama..." Kuwabara shrugged. "He's been actin' weird ever since. Lost it when he thought y'were dead. Destroyed half th'cave."

"I'm glad." Kurama smiled softly. "I prefer that to tears. Honestly, I'd like to believe my death would not leave him with quite as much sadness as _your_ near misses with becoming a ghost."

"What?" Kuwabara scratched the side of his head, staring at Kurama. "Why's anger better than...?" Kuwabara gnawed on his lip, then cleared his throat. "Never mind... Anyway. He was already kinda a mess 'cause some youkai attacked Atsuko-san-"

"Atsuko-san was attacked?" Kurama raised his eyebrows.

"Uh, yeah." Kuwabara cleared his throat again. "She was out an' some weird guys followed her. Turned out they were youkai but, hell... gotta think any youkai'd know better'n to mess with _Yuusuke_. His ma's okay. She just got a few scratches. She beat th'crap outta the youkai that attacked her, though."

"Ah..." Kurama smiled. "I have not met Atsuko-san but she seems... fascinating."

Kuwabara nodded. "We should head back. Make sure Hiei'n Urameshi ain't killin' each other."

"Yes, of course."

**_Thanks for sticking with this! I'm always looking for reviews, even criticism if the readers have any. _**


	6. Chapter 6

**_Really starting to get into the meat of the story now! Disclaimer from earlier chapters still applies._**

**_Chapter Six_**

Utter silence greeted Kurama and Kuwabara when they returned to the fire pit. Yuusuke was dozing softly against a tree and Hiei was quietly sharpening his sword, the finished meat skewers steaming on a makeshift grass mat beside him. He kept throwing Yuusuke disgusted looks.

The air was muggy and there were large buzzing insects nearby. The smoke from Hiei's fire kept most of them at bay, however. Kurama knelt beside Hiei and followed Kuwabara with his eyes as the redhead maneuvered around the campfire to reposition Yuusuke on the ground.

"He _is_ actually sleeping..." Kuwabara murmured with an air of amazement. "Mutterin' about tempura."

Kurama chuckled softly and sat more comfortably on the ground, shifting slightly toward Yuusuke as he did so. Hiei gave him a sharp look. "You."

Kurama raised his eyebrows at Hiei. "Me? What about me?"

"You are hiding something."

Kurama stared at Hiei, his expression carefully blank. "To what could you possibly be referring? I have a number of secrets. Is it suddenly my duty to share them all?"

Hiei was silent for several beats. "Unlike you to admit."

"Not like _you_ t'be so nosy either, Hiei," Kuwabara interjected, picking up a skewer.

Hiei scowled. "You _clearly_ have no idea what either of us is talking about."

"I don't know what _any _of you are talking about but it sounds way too intense." Yuusuke sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning loudly. "Woke me up with all this..." Yuusuke gestured. "Whatever it is."

"Hiei's bein' nosy," Kuwabara explained before taking a bite out of the meat. He grimaced.

"Kurama is _hiding something_. Something _important to his own survival._ If you ignorant morons would cease prattling about nonsense, perhaps he'd explain why he's hiding an _illness_." Hiei glared at Kurama again.

"If you had outright asked me if I were ill, Hiei, I would have-"

"Lied." Hiei moved closer to Kurama, staring at him. Kurama moved back slightly. "Your body heat rose degrees above normal even for a _kitsune_ over the past four hours."

"Hiei." Yuusuke called. "First off, since when do you pay attention to that shit and second, why the fuck are you talking so much suddenly?"

"Kurama is our most intelligent ally. I do not want to be stranded in Makai wilderness babysitting you while he is off pretending not to be _ill_." Hiei ground his teeth together.

"I do not feel _ill_." Kurama protested.

"You have a _fever_. Why am I always surrounded by morons? I refuse to believe you hadn't _noticed_."

"Uhh... now that y'mention it, Hiei, Kurama don't look right." Kuwabara shifted up on his knees. "I ain't a doctor though."

"Is Hiei a doctor?" Yuusuke leaned forward and looked at Kurama. "Kurama looks fine to me. Maybe a little taller than normal..."

"Now is hardly the time for jokes, Yuusuke." Kurama sat back against the tree. "I did not wish to trouble the whole group with a minor fever, Hiei. I am hardly _fragile_."

"Says the guy who kinda _died_ a little bit..." Yuusuke stood and walked around, reaching out to feel Kurama's forehead. "Okay so... you feel a lot warmer than a drunk person and drunk people usually feel like a person with a fever right?" Yuusuke pulled his hand away and glanced over his shoulder at Kuwabara. "You're the closest thing we've got to a doctor."

"I was learning to be a _pediatrician, _Urameshi. Not a youkai doctor! I dunno how t'tell if a youkai's got a fever or not. Kurama ain't exactly a human kid. Besides, only been in school fer three years. I was still workin' on the basics when I dropped out 'cause of all this crap." Kuwabara crossed his arms over his chest and scowled.

"Damn, you're right. We probably need a vet..." Yuusuke sat back down on his ass and scooted away from Kurama.

"I believe Kurama has already admitted that he has a _fever_." Hiei stood. "I'm going to scout the area. Try not to die while I'm gone."

Yuusuke looked pointedly at Kuwabara after Hiei left.

"What?" Kuwabara asked.

"You're the only one at the camp right now who hasn't died yet." Yuusuke kept staring at Kuwabara.

"Yuusuke." Kurama sighed heavily and flicked his tail. "I was not technically ever dead, you realize."

"You think so?" Yuusuke raised his eyebrows and looked back at Kurama. "What did it feel like?"

"Urameshi, I don't think-"

"It's alright, Kuwabara-kun." Kurama shrugged. "I felt as though I were trapped in a very small box with no light, sound or sensation for a short period of time before I slowly became aware of my own body again. When I was fully aware, I was laying in the forest as I appear now. I vaguely recall hearing shouting almost as soon as it got dark, some sort of explosion, then what was definitely Hiei shouting. Immense heat for quite a long time while I assume Hiei was carrying me, then I heard Shizuru demand to know where Kuwabara-kun was before the voices were too soft to distinguish from the wind."

"You heard a _lot_ less than I did. I thought your soul just... kinda did the same thing mine did after Sen-"

"Can we talk about somethin' else?" Kuwabara rubbed his arms and moved a bit closer to the fire.

"What now?" Yuusuke glared at Kuwabara. "Seems like you get pissed at everything I say lately. And someone explain why Hiei's talking so much! It's fucking _weird_."

"You were the one who told Hiei he talks too much the very moment you met him," Kurama said.

"How do you even know that?" asked Yuusuke. "You weren't even THERE."

Kurama smirked. "Hiei told me the entire story years ago right after it happened."

Yuusuke gave Kurama a sideways stare. "How did you get him to tell you stuff?"

"I listened instead of telling him to shut up. Hiei is not as secretive as he pretends to be. I tried to tell you this quite some time ago but you never listened to me." Kurama laughed. "Is it any wonder Hiei was constantly so silent around you?"

"He didn't talk because he thought I wasn't listening? I fucking listen all the time! You never told me Hiei liked to talk." Yuusuke scowled. "Jeez. Just because I act like a doofus, that's no reason to treat me like one."

"You misunderstood." Kurama shook his head. "Hiei is not terribly good at reading people. He was silent because you told him it was a bad tactic to speak to an enemy so much. He respected your advice because you won the fight."

"Why is he talking so much now?" Yuusuke glanced over his shoulder. "Can he hear us?"

"It does not matter whether or not Hiei can hear us. We are not saying anything he does not already know." Kurama closed his eyes. "Regardless, I do not know why Hiei is choosing to speak around you more. I know he insulted Kuwabara-kun often to motivate him to become stronger so he would not die. Hiei is a complicated person, Yuusuke."

"And how do you know all this?" Yuusuke squinted across the fire.

"Because..." Kurama yawned, closing his eyes and tilted his head against the tree. "Hiei is my friend..." Kurama was asleep a moment later.

"The fever is _obviously_ making him delirious," Hiei muttered.

Kuwabara whipped around and gaped at Hiei who was suddenly standing behind him.. "How'd you...? When...?"

"If you cannot sense me by now, you are _beyond_ help." Hiei turned his attention to Yuusuke. "Do not listen to a word he says."

"Why not?" Yuusuke wiggled his eyebrows. "Was he lying?"

Hiei rolled his eyes and put a damp piece of cloth over Kurama's forehead.

"So... Are you a doctor or not?" Yuusuke dodged a punch Hiei aimed at his head.

"I possess common sense and basic first aid skills that any reasonable fighter should know! You and the oaf are not amusing me with your infantile antics. Be silent or else say something _useful_."

"Wow, Hiei, yer in a bad mood." Kuwabara inched a bit closer to Yuusuke.

"This is not a _mood_. Kurama is sick and no one seems to understand how that puts all of us at risk. How do you propose that we remain hidden while Kurama is in control of all of our camouflage? He is too ill not to know when to keep his mouth shut, let alone maintain our facade." Hiei started climbing a tree. "I will keep watch."

"I don't get it," Yuusuke whispered to Kuwabara. "Why is Hiei panicking so bad? We're in the middle of the woods and if Kurama says his fever is no big deal, why doesn't Hiei just listen to him?"

"Kurama also told you he was fine when he was... i-in the cave, Urameshi. How'd y'forget that? H-how can y'trust him after he let y'think he was okay and then d-died right in front of your face?" Kuwabara rubbed his arms again. "Dunno, Urameshi.."

"...You don't think he wasn't sure he was _going_ to be okay?" Yuusuke frowned. "Kurama's never lied to me yet."

"Dunno if I can call it lyin' but even if he knew he was gonna be okay, why didn't he tell us how he knew yet? I dunno if Kurama really knows what happened t'him." Kuwabara patted Yuusuke's arm. "He don't remember anything from right before everything got messed up."

"Wait..." Yuusuke scratched the back of his head. "Oh... Oh _fuck_... You're right. He had no idea why he was in the cave. He seems okay now even if, yeah, a little loopy from fever. I wasn't trying to piss Hiei off, either. I just don't get why he's suddenly so... I dunno... he's being weird around Kurama. I knew Hiei was looking out for us but he's acting like Kurama's about to... die... again... Oh holy shit, does that mean Hiei's freaked out about Kurama dying because he.. sorta just did?"

Kuwabara gave Yuusuke a long, silent look then turned away and sighed. "You can be real slow sometimes."

"Just because I'm not fuckin' college educated... Always gotta be a smartass. And why are you being weird too?" Yuusuke scowled at Kuwabara. "Do _you_ have a fever? Are _you_ freaking out about someone dying?"

Kuwabara wrung his hands in his lap but shook his head. "No. I ain't worried 'bout anybody dyin'. Not really. I mean, stuff's kinda dangerous right now but I know me you an' Hiei can hold our own enough t'protect Kurama until he's fit t'fight again and after what he jus' lived through, it ain't surprisin' he's a little sick anyhow. Plus, everybody we care about except Koenma is at the Temple. Nothin's gettin' past Botan-san, sis an' Yukina-san. Not t'mention yer ma and Keiko. Plus all the protection of th'old lady's land _and_ Puusuke!"

Yuusuke winced. "Well, I'm glad everyone's okay. Especially Keiko and my ma. I know they're both still targets for anyone who wants to hurt me." Yuusuke glanced at Kurama briefly and then looked at Kuwabara. "I'm... kinda glad you're not at the temple. One less person I have to wonder about." Yuusuke cleared his throat and slid away from Kuwabara by an inch or two.

"_Now_!" Kurama shouted in his sleep. He woke a moment later, blinking rapidly several times, his breathing ragged.

Yuusuke hurried over to Kurama. "Are you alright?" He took the damp rag from Kurama's head and found it was _dry_. "Oi! Hiei!" Yuusuke called. But Hiei was already a foot away.

"It was only a bad dream..." Kurama whispered. He let out a whine and shifted.

Hiei reached out and touched Kurama's forehead. "Your fever has increased again."

"Look for a willow tree and bring me the bark," Kurama rasped.

"We are in _Makai_ you fool!" Hiei snapped. "What would work instead?"

"Opium."

"That ain't right, Kurama. Are you hurtin'? Hold on..." Kuwabara rifled through the duffle-bag, hands shaking and found the first aid kid he'd packed. "I got some aspirin."

"That will do." Kurama drifted off to sleep before Kuwabara could hand him the pill.

Hiei looked around at Kuwabara. "What now?"

"Put it under his tongue." Kuwabara handed the pill to Hiei and watched in amazement as the hiyoukai pried Kurama's mouth open and poked the pill under his tongue before pressing his hands to the sides of Kurama's neck. "What're you doin'?"

Hiei said nothing, just closed his eyes. The jagan glowed purple and moments later Kurama's breathing evened out and he looked less flushed.

Kuwabara glanced at Yuusuke, finally noticing the pinching pain in his forearm from where Yuusuke was gripping it tight enough his nails dug in. "Urameshi?" Kuwabara nudged Yuusuke. "Let go."

Yuusuke withdrew his hand, spluttering an awkward apology as he pulled away.

"He's gonna be fine, Yuusuke." Kuwabara's tone was light and comforting. Hiei shot him a glare. "What?"

"You do not know that for certain. Do not fill his head with false hope." Hiei backed away. "He will live. Provided he is alert enough to eat soon." Hiei sat down a few inches from Kurama.

"What'd y'do?" Kuwabara leaned back against the tree behind him, tensing when Yuusuke shifted closer.

"Pulled the heat away from his body." Hiei closed his eyes. "One of you remain conscious. Or I will kill you." Hiei fell asleep sitting upright with Yuusuke and Kuwabara gaping at him.

* * *

_The walls are closing in. There is nowhere to run. From every part of my body, a sick, oily feeling cascades inward. I feel tainted, even moreso than I had been. I am not safe here. I do not know if I am alive or dead but the thought of death comforts more than frightens me. I would take myself out of this agony if I had the strength to move a muscle but every slight spasm causes me pain. My friends continually speak to me but I cannot hear them. I have been carried a great distance. I do not know where I am._

_All I know is pain_.

Kurama kept drifting in and out of consciousness over the next few days. The camp was silent around him for the most part. He was vaguely aware of someone wiping his face with a wet cloth on occasion and the sounds of his friends' muffled reasurrances. It didn't matter. Kurama was sure he was going to die. What he worried about most was not his own body and life but what would happen to his comrades if he should pass on. And that was the only thing that kept him fighting through the waves of hot torturous pain. He'd feel blissfully unaware of it for a moment at a time. The moments without pain were his least lucid.

"The train..." Kurama muttered. "I have to get there."

Yuusuke looked at Kurama for a few moments. They'd been watching Kurama deteriorate for days. The worse Kurama's symptoms got, the quieter and more focused and intense Hiei was. After three days, Hiei stopped talking altogether and basically ignored Kuwabara and Yuusuke. Yuusuke and Kuwabara were watching Hiei with dumbfounded expressions half the time. They'd either chat quietly back and forth or observe Hiei as he wiped sweat off of Kurama's face with a wet rag a few times. There had also been a significant decrease in the temperature of the forest. Neither Yuusuke nor Kuwabara mentioned it but both realized it was probably Hiei's doing somehow.

"We're kinda... running out of food," Yuusuke muttered. "Think you and me should go hunting?"

Kuwabara looked at Yuusuke for a moment, almost flinching at how ragged Yuusuke looked. "We'll last another day without huntin'," Kuwabara whispered back.

"I will go," Hiei said. Yuusuke and Kuwabara both looked up. Hiei hadn't said a word in almost two days. He didn't say anything else and was out of the clearing before Kuwabara had a chance to shout "we should stay together!" (he did anyway).

"Fool..." Kurama shifted slightly onto his side and gripped at the dirt. "The cave is full of poison."

"Fuck." Yuusuke stood and kicked at the dirt beneath his feet. "_Fuck_!"

Kuwabara was on his feet moments after Yuusuke began pacing. He stood near Yuusuke but far enough so that Yuusuke wouldn't strike him with all of his rage-fueled gesturing. "What the FUCK are we supposed to do now?! Huh?! Fucking _Hiei_ can't even bother to say shit to us and Kurama's... sick and spouting off a bunch of crazy shit."

"Urameshi." Kuwabara took a step toward Yuusuke, holding up his hands. "Calm down a second."

Yuusuke stopped in his tracks, giving Kuwabara the most menacing scowl he possessed. "Don't tell me to calm down! Don't you fucking tell me what to do!"

"Yuusuke." Kuwabara took another step toward Yuusuke. A muscle in Yuusuke's jaw twitched and he kept his eyes locked on Kuwabara's. "We gotta jus' wait this out. Hiei knows what he's doin'. Haven't seen hide 'r hair of the SDF. Jus' stay calm."

"Stop talking to me like a freaking _mental patient_. You're pissing me off."

Yuusuke started pacing again. Kuwabara had his hand on Yuusuke's elbow a moment later. Yuusuke turned. Fist cocked and aimed at Kuwabara's face.

Kuwabara trembled slightly. He could feel Yuusuke's youki radiating off his body. Sparks of static electricity prickling at his elbow and Yuusuke just stood there. Staring at him with his fist in the air. Just _staring_.

"U-Urameshi?"

Yuusuke blinked and let go of Kuwabara's arm. He rolled his eyes and shoved Kuwabara but with so little force that Kuwabara didn't budge by a millimeter. "Sheesh. Tryin' to get yourself _killed_, dummy?"

"Hiei?" Kurama muttered. "Yuusuke? I... w-water."

Kuwabara was at Kurama's side before Yuusuke even looked up. He helped the kitsune sit up and tipped a cup of water (that smelled _incredibly clean_ considering Hiei got it out of a river) to Kurama's lips. "Thank you," Kurama coughed. He blinked a few times. "Where is Hiei?"

Yuusuke rushed over to help Kurama sit up against the tree so he could sip at the water. "He, uh, went to go kill dinner, I guess."

"How fortunate." Kurama closed his eyes.

"Try t'stay awake fer a bit, Kurama," Kuwabara said, a hand on Kurama's shoulder. "Gotta drink as much water as y'can and get some food in you."

"Yes. I will stay awake if you keep talking to me."

Yuusuke headed back to the other side of the fire pit. It was midday so there weren't even coals going. There was a wide, narrow track of packed dirt where Yuusuke always sat or paced. The plants Kurama had grown to shield them from the rest of the forest were still all doing what Kurama had intended.

"Dunno what t'say, though," Kuwabara muttered.

"Why don't you tell him how pretty his hair is?" Whatever obnoxious face Yuusuke was making when he said that, Kuwabara didn't even turn to see. But he took his hand off of Kurama's shoulder

"Thank you, Yuusuke," Kurama muttered.

"Looks nice. Even with the dirt and twigs. Cool color."

Kurama laughed. "I did not realize you enjoyed silver."

"Think you're getting better?"

"I certainly hope so..." Kurama opened his eyes, his lids were drooping. He looked like he hadn't slept at all.

"Think you can grow something for yer fever now?" Kuwabara asked. "Been giving you aspirin but it doesn't seem t'do much."

"Let me see..." Kurama reached into his hair, looking for seeds. He was surprised to find so many considering his transformation. He sifted through the seds trapped in tangles and twigs, wincing. A few moments later, Kurama pulled a seed out of his hair and dropped it on the ground. An odd, gnarly root grew where he'd dropped it. It didn't look like anything special. Kurama nibbled on one end, made a face then took a sip of water. He did this several times until the root was gone. "I wish I had tea..."

"You don't keep _that_ in your hair too?" Yuusuke smirked.

"No, unfortunately. I have plenty of seeds that I could turn into herbal teas but none of them would taste terribly good. I do not carry around green tea seeds nor do I enjoy the flavor of many flowers." Kurama closed his eyes again and sank back against the tree. "That... explanation took quite a lot of effort."

"Maybe you should use less words sometimes?" Yuusuke said. His smirk grew slightly as he spoke.

"Perhaps." Kurama turned his head slightly toward Kuwabara. "I'd prefer not to eat but I know I must. Is there anything left in the food supplies?"

"Right!" Kuwabara stood and headed for the duffle bag. He searched the bottom of the bag and found some jerky Hiei had smoked himself and put in old bags of store bought jerky. It didn't taste nearly as good but it was far more nutritious.

Kurama did the same nibbling thing he'd done with the root until he'd managed to eat a full strip. "I can't." Kurama waved off Kuwabara's offer of another piece. "My stomach is full. I feel I should sleep again. Tell Hiei I am feeling better." Kurama closed his eyes again. He was fast asleep in seconds.

"That was better'n usual." Kuwabara whispered, heading back over to sit down next to Yuusuke. Yuusuke moved a bit closer to Kuwabara almost as soon as Kuwabara sat down. "Sounded more with-it than th'last time he woke up fer sure. Plus he ate."

"Yeah, I'm over the moon about it..." Yuusuke muttered. "He can _talk_. He's still sick."

Kuwabara was quiet for a few seconds, listening to the sounds of the forest. "I think... somethin' else is buggin' ya."

Yuusuke scowled at Kuwabara. "Seriously?" Yuusuke's voice was dripping with sarcasm. "You think something _else_ is bugging me too. Like the fact we're in the fucking woods cut off from everybody we care about, being hunted by some dickbags with stupid... _stupid_." Yuusuke gestured incoherently. "I mean, nothing like breaking up with somebody, then having your mom attacked, then having your best friend kidnapped. Gee, no, my life sounds just fucking _spectacular_."

"What happened?" Kuwabara folded his hands in his lap. "I-I mean, y'don't gotta tell me if it's none of my busin-"

"See? This is what I like about you." Yuusuke turned and stared at the fire pit.

"Huh?" Kuwabara frowned, a light flush covering his cheeks.

"You're not an asshole." Yuusuke grinned. "See? You even let me change the subject."

"Like I said, it ain't my business..." Kuwabara shurgged.

"You mean..." Yuusuke glanced at Kuwabara quickly before looking away again. "Me and Keiko, right?"

"Yeah." Kuwabara moved a few inches closer to Yuusuke.

"It's... kinda hard to explain." Yuusuke shrugged. "It just... wasn't going to happen."

"Why not?" Kuwabara frowned again, brow furrowed. "I don't get it. Everybody thought y'were gonna be t'gether fer e... uh, y'know...?"

Yuusuke laughed bitterly. "Yeah. That's part of the problem, isn't it? She's a _human_. A really fragile one, too... Don't look at me like that! Look at her! I know she's tougher than a lot of humans but she's still a regular human. Besides..." Yuusuke sighed and stared down at his hands. "It's my fault for... not... being... right."

"Urameshi... I-I think y'could get over her bein' human. I know it'll be tough. Her bein' so much less... I dunno! I don't get why yer so down on yerself." Kuwabara patted Yuusuke on the back. Yuusuke didn't tense up at all this time which was better than usual. ""She seemed pretty happy with ya in spite of whatever y'think's wrong."

Yuusuke looked up at Kuwabara and patted the redhead on the cheek. His hand lingered perhaps a moment too long before he pulled away, stretching like it was no big deal. "I'm not cut out for marriage. Not to her, that's for sure. I'm not the man she deserves to be with."

"Why not? Yer just as good a man as any!" Kuwabara was grasping at straws here. He couldn't have Yuusuke thinking he was worthless as a man!

"No... No, I mean... Well, fuck, you're a better man than _I_ am. Hell. But I didn't say I was bad or anything." Yuusuke shrugged. "I'm just not _right_ for _Keiko_. Understand? We're not as perfect as you thought. I'm not mad or anything. I'll be okay. We're still friends. I mean, hell, she took it worse than _I_ did, I think... I dunno, hard to tell with Keiko."

"I thought she broke up with _you_." Kuwabara gave Yuusuke a sideways look.

"Yeah. And it was really hard for her so just... don't even bring it up to her. I'll be okay. I think she'll be fine too, but... uh, yeah, the girl really loves me." Yuusuke rubbed his cheek and looked at Kuwabara's face again. "How come you already got stubble?"

Kuwabara laughed, glad Yuusuke had changed the subject. "Maybe it's because I'm a better man, huh?"

For the first time in a while, Yuusuke laughed too.

**_Any and all feedback is welcome and encouraged. Even if you're sending hatemail._**


	7. Chapter 7

**_Chapter Seven_**

By the time Hiei got back with "dinner" (the beast Hiei had slaughtered was unrecognizable once the hiyoukai had returned) Kurama had been asleep for nearly an hour. As soon as Hiei came back, however, Kurama was awake again.

"Hey, Urameshi," Kuwabara stood and grabbed Yuusuke by the elbow to haul him to his feet. "I think we better go somewhere else fer a bit."

"Huh? W-wha?" Yuusuke stammered, heels digging in, but he followed Kuwabara anyway.

"We don't wanna be in earshot right now." Kuwabara shrugged. "We'll be back in two hours, alright?"

Hiei nodded but said nothing. He sat down beside Kurama, looking at the kitsune appraisingly. "Your color has returned."

"My color?" Kurama raised his eyebrows. "Really? I suppose that must be a good thing."

Hiei headed to the creature and pulled out its core, bringing it to Kurama.

Kurama chuckled softly. "Yes, of course. The most nutritious part of this particular animal."

"You are ill." Hiei sat down a few feet away from Kurama and kept glancing over at the kitsune while he ate.

"Do you have something to say?" Kurama licked his fingertips. Hiei watched intently.

After a pause, Hiei shrugged and looked at the ground. "I'm glad you woke. I was growing tired of being left alone with those idiotic children."

"Oh? Have they been particularly irritating?" Kurama smiled. He licked the remainder of the blood and gore off his hands. Out of respect for Hiei, he'd eaten the beast's entire core even though it stretched his stomach to the limit. He felt full and sleepy, glad there was a tree behind him to lean against.

"Their banter has... changed." Hiei shrugged again. "Yuusuke looks at the oaf as though he is some sort of food. It is disgusting."

"Understandable. It is apparent that Yuusuke desires to copulate with Kuwabara-kun." Kurama folded his arms over his chest and closed his eyes.

"What?" Hiei raised an eyebrow, moving a bit closer to Kurama. "By that, I assume you mean fuck?"

"That _is_what I meant, yes." Kurama opened his eyes in time to see a fleeting look of absolute revulsion on Hiei's face.

"Why? What could _possibly_be appealing about that whiny human?"

"Perhaps it is Kuwabara-kun's strength?" Kurama smirked. "Or perhaps Yuusuke has a fondness for tall men? I do not know. I have not asked. I do, however, believe that Kuwabara-kun is a desirable choice in a partner. Certainly, he seems interested in Yuusuke as well."

Hiei stared at Kurama quietly for several moments before turning away, sighing. "You are infuriating."

"What is it?" Kurama shifted slightly, leaning his weight forward and rested his hands on the ground.

"You have not been conscious for nearly a week." Hiei started ripping apart the beast's flesh into smaller pieces and stabbed them with sticks to make kabobs.

"I feel significantly better now. Not, perhaps, up to a fight but certainly no longer in danger of death."

Hiei looked at Kurama in that appraising way again. Kurama frowned, unused to Hiei looking at him so _curiously_. It was unnerving. "If you are not up to sparring, I should just assume that sex is out of the question."

For a moment, Kurama was silent, staring at Hiei then he chuckled. "I never thought I would see the day that _you_ would proposition me for sex." At Hiei's irritated expression, Kurama quickly stifled his laughter. "Do not be offended. I am laughing because I am _pleased_."

"You are _strange_." Hiei shook his head. "You behave as though this is the first time I have asked."

Kurama was silent again, wracking his brain, trying to recall Hiei having ever asked him for sex. "I think this is something that I would _remember_, Hiei."

Hiei scoffed and started the fire going again.

"Kuwabara-kun informed me... I have apparently forgotten around six months or so?" Kurama tucked a strand of silver hair over his shoulder. "Perhaps this was during that time?"

Hiei just scowled and adjusted one of the logs so the fire would burn more evenly.

"Something has caused me to forget _everything_ that has happened. Believe me, Hiei, I _want_to remember this conversation."

"It was not a _conversation_." Hiei shot Kurama a disgusted look over his shoulder. "After enduring weeks of your ridiculous _flirting_, you finally told me rather than trying to entice me with suggestive looks."

"How many times have we had sex?"

"I do not keep track of such things." Hiei looked back at the fire. "More than once. Fewer than ten. I do not know and I do not care... Stop _smirking._"

"I cannot help it, Hiei, I'm very glad. It greatly decreases a significant amount of my former discomfort." Kurama stood awkwardly, nearly falling a few times before he managed to stride over to Hiei and sit down again. He was shaky but felt better knowing he _could_move with proper motivation.

"Why would you be... uncomfortable?" Hiei kept his eyes on the fire and the skewers of meat.

"Because of my dreams."

Hiei gave Kurama a sour look and turned the skewers. "I would rather not discuss such horrifying things."

"Yes. It will be a long while before I forget those images." Kurama shuddered and held his hands out to the fire to warm them. He smiled when he felt a wave of heat coming off of Hiei as well. "I do not recall your preferences, obviously, but I definitely have the strength to pleasure you with my mouth."

Hiei gave Kurama a glare that was _slightly_softer than his usual one. "I would burn your tongue again."

"Tongues heal quickly. It is nothing I cannot handle, I am sure."

Hiei turned toward Kurama. "You are _ill_."

"I feel much better." Kurama smiled and lightly touched Hiei's knee, inching his hand up Hiei's thigh. "I may not be healthy enough to allow reciprocation but I assure you, I _would _enjoy giving you head."

Hiei snorted. "I am already well aware of how you _enjoy _it."

"Will you allow it?"

"Shut up." Hiei stood. Due to Kurama's greater height in this form, Hiei barely had to lean down to nip at the kitsune's lip. He nipped harder when Kurama smiled, harder still when Kurama ran his claws up under Hiei's shirt. Hiei's suppressed shudder was enough to alert Kurama that Hiei enjoyed having the place just under his under arms touched and Kurama made it a point to run his fingers over the same area again.

Kurama could hardly believe he wasn't dreaming again. The thought caused a flutter of panic in the pit of his stomach but when Hiei leaned in to bite the tip of one of his ears, Kurama let out a gasp. That felt _real _enough.

* * *

_Fuck! I'm such an IDIOT. He's going to think I'm a total HEADCASE now. What the fuck do I do? I can't run off. I gotta stick with my team or I'm toast. Those SDF bastards would find me in a second without the other guys helping keep me from doing dumb shit. But now what? I fucked EVERYTHING UP._

Yuusuke didn't understand why Kuwabara suddenly hauled him off into the forest. At first, he'd been too surprised by the redhead's _strength_and the feeling of his firm hand on his bicep...

Wait. Yuusuke was trying to straighten this all out in his head. And thinking about Kuwabara's hands was not helping.

Alright.

It all started when Kuwabara grabbed him by the elbow and hauled him to his feet. Yuusuke (for his _own_ reasons) took several minutes to yank his arm away and protest. "Jeez! You can't just push and pull a guy around like that, Kuwabara." Yuusuke straightened his _filthy_ shirt indignantly. "I _hate_that shit."

"Sorry Urameshi. Just... wanted t'take a walk. Give Kurama some time t'talk to Hiei and all..." Kuwabara shrugged and rubbed the back of his neck. Was that a blush Yuusuke saw?

No. Way.

"Alright, jeez, fine." Yuusuke threw up his hands. "What? You think they're gonna make out?"

"Don't be such a _jerk_, Urameshi!" Kuwabara scowled. "Why'd you have to keep makin' jokes like that?"

"I _always_ make jokes like that. _Duh_." Yuusuke shook his head. "I don't get it. Why the _fuck_ does it bother you _now_ all of a sudden? You think I'm making fun of Kurama for being _gay_or something?"

"Y-yeah! That's exactly what I think!" Okay. Kuwabara was definitely blushing now.

"No way!" Yuusuke actually stomped one of his feet and tucked some of his hair behind one ear. It was getting _really long_. "You think I'd say that shit if I thought Kurama was _actually_ gay? Give me a break, man! I'm just fooling around. I _really_ don't care even if they _are_making out." Yuusuke shuddered.

"Wh-what? What if Kurama _was_gay?"

"Good for Kurama!" Yuusuke threw up his hands again and started pacing. "Gay, straight, actually a woman, since when has stuff like that ever made anyone different to me? He's my damn _brother_, Kuwabara."

"Alright, Urameshi." Kuwabara held up his hands. "Try t'relax, alright?"

Yuusuke stopped pacing. He looked Kuwabara dead in the eyes. "Fight me, then."

"What?" Kuwabara frowned. "Urameshi, I don't think-"

"Not for real." Yuusuke took off his shirt and tossed it to the ground. It'd just get _ripped _off anyway. "Just... spar with me." Yuusuke smirked. "You still haven't beaten me in a fight."

"Shuddup, Yuusuke! Yer a youkai!" Kuwabara, nonetheless, shed his own shirt and took a fighting stance.

"Yeah, yeah. Excuses, excuses. What's next?" Yuusuke made a cheesy _come at me_gesture with his hands. "On your period? Can't fight? Got a headache?"

"Yer really getting on my _nerves_, Urameshi!"

"Then _hit me_, dumbshit!"

The last syllable was barely out of Yuusuke's mouth when Kuwabara charged at him. That suited Yuusuke just fine. It wasn't like he'd use youki on Kuwabara. At least, on physical strength alone (without spiritual additions) they were on an even footing. Kuwabara was bigger, had more physical force behind his punches. Actually, Yuusuke was sort of amazed. Yuusuke was deadly fast whether he used youki or not and Kuwabara was holding his own. Returning blows. At one point, Kuwabara punched Yuusuke full in the face. It wasn't enough to send Yuusuke flying but he did stagger, quickly recovering to do a sweep kick while he dodged Kuwabara's next punch. An uppercut to the stomach from below finally dropped Kuwabara to the ground. Yuusuke aimed both feet at Kuwabara's stomach, effectively flipping the redhead onto his back. Kuwabara landed with an _oof_of a noise and Yuusuke's own momentum had him (predictably) landing right on top of Kuwabara.

"I'm impressed," Yuusuke muttered, hands braced in the dirt on either side of Kuwabara's head while they both caught their breath. Yuusuke couldn't help admiring the way Kuwabara's face and the tips of his ears were flushed. His lips were parted, panting. There was a light sheen of sweat dripping down Kuwabara's cheek and neck. Yuusuke moved one of his hands to Kuwabara's toned chest, feeling hard muscle and an impressive amount of chest hair. It had only been two weeks but Kuwabara already had a pretty impressive beard started. Yuusuke wanted to lean down and rub his cheek against it. He was halfway to pressing his lips against Kuwabara's before he realized what he was doing. _"Fuck_!" Yuusuke leaped up and slowly backed away from Kuwabara. "Shit. I... _fuck_."

So of course, Yuusuke took off.

Of _course_.

Because he's a fucking _idiot_ that's why.

_**I know this update was super short but there are reasons. Hopefully, I can get the chapters in closer to my once-a-week update schedule. Things are heating up, huh? Please review! And remember, the "uncut" version is on the other website.**_


	8. Chapter 8

_**Disclaimer: It's STILL not mine**_

_**Chapter Eight**_

"What... just happened?" Kuwabara muttered. He looked up at the canopy of leaves above him for a second and barely registered the tree root digging into his back before he jumped up and hurried after Yuusuke. By that time, Yuusuke had gotten a significant head-start on him. Kuwabara sighed and dashed off as quickly as he could in the direction he'd heard Yuusuke go. Kuwabara would just go in a straight line and then come right back. That way, he wouldn't get lost.

Luckily, Kuwabara spotted Yuusuke as he was coming down a steep hill in the forest. He skid in the dirt but still managed to slide through some damp moss right into Yuusuke's side. Yuusuke actually _flinched_ a little and elbowed Kuwabara in the ribs out of reflex.

"Oh fuck!" Yuusuke turned and reached for Kuwabara. "Did that hurt a lot?"

"_No_!" Kuwabara crossed his arms and actually scowled at Yuusuke. "Enough t'leave a little bruise, maybe? I dunno, Urameshi. I've taken harder hits from you to the _face_."

"Oh, yeah..."

Kuwabara cleared his throat. "What was that all about?"

Yuusuke shook his head slightly and chuckled a little. After a long pause, he let his hand fall back to his side and shrugged. "Nothing."

"You're being real weird, Urameshi! One second, we're sparrin'. As soon as you tackled me, you started acting like a weirdo." Kuwabara rubbed his side, staring at his feet for a moment. "Thought you were gonna kiss me or something."

Kuwabara braced himself for the punch he was _sure_ was coming, but Yuusuke just laughed. "Yeah, right. Like I wouldn't just push you up against a tree and do it if I felt like making out."

"N-no you wouldn't!" Kuwabara stared at Yuusuke, wide-eyed. He was _sure_ his face was on fire. He felt like he was going to burst into flames from the force of his blush. "J-jesus. That's not funny."

"Who said it was supposed to be _funny_?!" Yuusuke shouted. A couple of wild birds actually took off into the sky and sparks shot out of Yuusuke's fingertips when he threw his hands up. Kuwabara caught a brief look of _hurt_ on Yuusuke's face before Yuusuke started laughing again. "Wow. You're... You're something else, you know it?" Yuusuke turned and started walking back. "Come on, Kuwabara. Camp's back this way. Just a couple yards."

"No."

Yuusuke paused in mid-stride and did a clumsy pirouette as he turned to look at Kuwabara. He stood perfectly still with one foot in the air. "What?"

Maybe it hadn't been Kuwabara's smartest idea. He coughed a bit as the dirt from Yuusuke's stupid ballerina trick settled back to the ground and just stood there, shaking a little from nerves. Or his blush. More likely, it was the stupid weird tingling he'd felt in his chest when he realized that Yuusuke didn't even look _angry_. Just confused. "I'm not letting you take off again. About had a heart-attack when you took off like that a couple minutes ago." Kuwabara cleared his throat. "You can't just... up and leave to avoid dealing with something."

"Why do you sound so... _serious_ and _smart_?" He was _still_ standing on one foot!

Kuwabara scowled. "I'm sick of talking like a thug so you won't pick on me for being _smarter than you_."

Yuusuke's look of confusion turned to one of actual _shock_. Finally. A reaction other than anger or shallow joking.

Yuusuke swayed and let his other foot fall back to the ground. "What the _hell_?" Kuwabara could barely hear his voice.

"Just... stop changing the subject, okay? I dunno what's been going on with you lately." Kuwabara took a deep breath and one step toward Yuusuke. "I dunno if you're acting weird because your heart is broken over Keiko or-"

"I'm not _heart-broken_ over Keiko, you _dick_." Yuusuke folded his arms over his chest. All expression left his face. "I don't know why the hell you're taking so long to figure it out."

"Figure WHAT out?" Kuwabara shouted.

Yuusuke shrugged. "You said so yourself; you're fucking SMART. So why the fuck would you not know when I'm joking?!"

"What does _that _have to do with anything?" Kuwabara's voice actually raised a couple pitches and he grumbled a bit before taking a step back. "You're not making sense. Most of the stuff you _say_ is a jok-"

"No, it's not." Yuusuke kicked the dirt and crossed his arms again. But his shoulders were still slumped. "I say a lot of stuff that's joking and... a lot that's... actually true and-" Yuusuke looked up and gave Kuwabara the _saddest-looking_ smile Kuwabara had ever seen. "It's really WEIRD. I thought you knew me better."

Kuwabara gnawed on his bottom lip. For a second, he thought his heart _did_ stop. Or maybe broke. Or _something_ because Yuusuke looked vulnerable and that was REALLY intense. Yuusuke was never vulnerable. Even the times Kuwabara KNEW Yuusuke was upset about something he never looked like... _this._

"Are you gonna tell me what I'm not getting?" Kuwabara asked after several moments of just _staring_ at Yuusuke (and honestly fighting back some really heavy emotions). "I can't read your mind, Yuusuke..."

Yuusuke's sad smile flickered and disappeared, then he was turning around. "You _never_ call me 'Yuusuke'. That's weird."

"Why's it weird?" Kuwabara was confused again. He walked over to Yuusuke, wanting to pat his shoulder or something but when Yuusuke glanced at him again, he was smiling. And he didn't look sad this time.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you." Yuusuke shoved his hands in his pockets and started walking back toward camp.

"That doesn't explain _anything_!" Kuwabara called. Yuusuke just kept walking so Kuwabara hurried to catch up. "Come on, what the heck?"

"Shut up, seriously." Yuusuke shot Kuwabara an annoyed glance.

"I wanna know what you're acting so weird about. Why do you keep just walking off instead of explaining what you _mean_?"

Kurama was dozing by the fire again but woke up when Yuusuke came back into camp a few strides ahead of Kuwabara. "Maybe I'm not _ready_ to explain it yet! Jeez. Get off my ass about it."

Hiei threw a hot coal at Yuusuke. It went so wide, it had to be an intentional miss. "Trying to set me on fire?" Yuusuke muttered as he took his usual place across the camp.

"If I had intended to set you on fire, I have more efficient means." Hiei's mouth twitched slightly like he was considering _maybe_ thinking about smiling. "It would be such a waste of youki, though. And I don't doubt the reek of your burning flesh would take months to dissipate."

Yuuuske said nothing for a long moment before he burst out laughing. "Did you just _try_ to tell a joke?" He smirked while Hiei rolled his eyes. "Better than usual."

"Indeed," Kurama muttered.

"You look... healthier." Kuwabara crouched a bit to get a closer look at Kurama. "Did you eat somethin' yet?"

Kurama nodded. "Hiei made sure I consumed enough protein."

"Wha-? O-oh!" Kuwabara flushed when the significance of Kurama's words sank in.

"What?" Yuusuke asked, looking at Kuwabara and Kurama and then Hiei. "_What_?"

"How would _I_ know?" Hiei muttered. "They are both idiots."

Kurama chuckled. Kuwabara just stood and walked back over to his usual side of the camp beside Yuusuke. "Don't worry about it, Urameshi."

Yuusuke twitched and looked at Kuwabara, frowning for a second. "Eh. As long as Kurama's healthier."

"I am not quite at my healthiest." Kurama smiled in a way that made Kuwabara squirm a little in his seat. "I will be soon. Don't you agree, Hiei?"

Hiei looked over at Kurama and shrugged then went back to turning the meat on the smoking rack. "It will be a relief when you are."

"Ohhh! I get it!" Yuusuke laughed. "Jeez, Kurama. It's about time."

"What the _hell_, Urameshi?" Kuwabara scowled. "D-"

"Kuwabara-kun," Kurama interrupted. "_Please_ stop being offended on my behalf. I assure you, I find Yuusuke's antics primarily amusing, if nothing else." Kurama cleared his throat and shifted forward. "If, on the other hand, you have some other reason for being irritated, in particular, about _that_ type of joke, it would probably be wise to simply tell him rather than this bizarre, explosive reaction to Yuusuke's usual brand of humor."

Kuwabara actually _glared_ at Kurama for saying that out loud.

"Wait, what?" Yuusuke looked from Kurama to Kuwabara. "What's he talking about? What _type_ of joke? That wasn't a damn _joke_!"

"I know, Yuusuke." Kurama smiled. Yuusuke looked like he wanted to punch the smile off of Kurama's face. Kuwabara sort of felt like doing it himself.

"Kurama is trying to _help,_ you incompetents." Hiei stood and headed toward the nearest tree. "I will scan the area from as far up as possible so I don't have to listen to either of you _whine_." Hiei started jumping up the tree branches and Kuwabara was amused that Hiei was doing it slow enough that he could see all of his movements.

But only for a second because he was still mad at Kurama.

"I don't get it." Yuusuke shook his head. "I really don't. If Kurama can tell when I'm not joking, why is it so hard for _you_?" Yuusuke poked Kuwabara on the arm.

"I believe I know." Kurama closed his eyes. "You are both keeping strange secrets from each other. At first, I had been planning to let you sort it out between the two of you. However, your constant bickering has become something of a hazard. Shouting at one another in the forest is a good way to attract attention."

"Why is it that you always know what's going on before anyone else?" Yuusuke asked.

Kurama laughed and laid down on the fur of some animal Hiei had slaughtered and skinned. "I need to sleep. Please sort out this misunderstanding as softly as you are able."

Kuwabara and Yuusuke were silent for a few long, awkward moments while they waited for Kurama to fall asleep. The only way Kuwabara felt like he wouldn't wake Kurama with his talking was by scooting closer to Yuusuke and speaking in hushed tones. So he did just that. "How do I tell when somethin' you say is a joke? You kinda say everything like it's meant t'be one."

"I figured..." Yuusuke sighed. "I kinda figured you knew that most of the stuff I say is actually pretty _true_. I don't really hide what I think..."

"But... that'd mean..."

"I wasn't joking about making out with you in the forest, Kuwabara." Yuusuke muttered that in such a rush that it was hard for Kuwabara to understand at first. "I just... don't wanna say stuff like that seriously in case you decide not to talk to me ever again."

Kuwabara was dead silent for almost a minute. He had to repeat Yuusuke's words in his head several times, and then take a deep breath to avoid _shouting_ what he said next. "Wh-why would that make me not ever wanna speak to you again?"

Yuusuke raised an eyebrow at Kuwabara. "What? Like that's something guys can just _say_ to each other without it being weird? Get real! No matter how accepting you are of Kurama and Hiei being _them_, it's not the same thing as having _me_... be... like that too."

"L-like what?" Kuwabara almost wanted to stand up and say what he had to say next on the other side of the planet from Yuusuke. "Like being... gay?"

"_No_!" Kurama stirred in his sleep so Yuusuke lowered his voice again. "No. I mean... I don't even wanna go into that. But, uh, at least you know I'm not just being an ass and making jokes about gay stuff because... _holy shit_, that's a weight off my shoulders."

Kuwabara frowned and looked at Yuusuke sideways. "You're attracted to me but you're not gay?"

"I never said that. I said I didn't want to get into the gay thing. I can't even deal with that right now. But... the rest of it, yeah."

"You're attracted to me."

"I already said that." Yuusuke smirked. "I guess I could have said it a little different. 'Cause it's not just wanting your body or anything. I mean, that'd be stupid and disrespectful. Not that you're not hot!" Yuusuke waved his hands in front of his face. "I mean. It's not... just because you're hot."

Kuwabara just couldn't comprehend Yuusuke calling him hot. He'd have to over-look that for now because the idea of Yuusuke thinking he was _hot_ was just outrageous. "B-but _you're_ the one who's... who..."

"Oh, I know I'm hotter than you. You don't have to say it." Yuusuke's smirk grew to a cheesy grin. "I'm just glad you don't hate me for thinking _you_ are."

"Urameshi... I've had a crush on you since we were fourteen." Kuwabara gnawed on his lower lip, almost biting the tip of his tongue several times. That had taken _all_ of his willpower to say.

"Yeah... I sorta thought you might." Yuusuke shrugged and turned toward Kuwabara.

"Wh-what? Why didn't you say so?!"

"In case I was _wrong_." Yuuuske shrugged again, inching toward Kuwabara a bit. "So... since I'm _not_ wrong..." Yuusuke inched even closer. By now he was close enough to Kuwabara to make Kuwabara want to back away. Just because of how many times having Yuusuke that close meant some kind of physical pain was going to follow.

"What?" Kuwabara had to crane his neck slightly to look Yuusuke in the eyes now. This was ridiculous. It all made sense a moment later when Yuusuke closed his eyes and leaned up a bit, pressing his lips against Kuwabara's.

Oh.

Right.

Yuusuke had said he _hadn't_ been joking about making out. Kuwabara understood now. And he was _glad_ he did because kissing Yuusuke had been one of his greatest aspirations for so many years. Now he was finally kissing _Yuusuke_ and he felt like an awkward, bumbling teenager (even though he'd kissed a few other people in the past). This was _Yuusuke_ and Kuwabara was _damn_ nervous.

Luckily, Yuusuke pulled away after only about fifteen seconds. Even that short period was enough to make Kuwabara feel like he could hardly breathe. He lost his breath a second time when he caught the most radiant smile he'd ever seen; and _Yuusuke _was directing it at _him_.

_**Please leave me reviews! I haven't gotten very many. I'd like to know what people think, even if you have complaints. I handle criticisms really well, I promise.**_


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